How we got here and what we do now…

I flew home from China to be with my family at Kamala Harris’ celebration tonight. I’m proud of my brother Liam for working on her campaign, and she is arguably the most important Democrat in our country now. These are my late night ramblings during one of the most emotional moments of our lives.

We lost this election because we’re a bunch of arrogant clueless self-centered entitled stubborn tone-deaf lazy spoiled brats.

1. The self-proclaimed cultural elite city dwellers are no better than anyone else. We think differently, we live differently, and we have more influence on the internet. That is not the real world and certainly not the entire world. The internet is the most powerful tool in the world, and nothing (at least I can’t think of an exception) can happen without passing through it, but we must surpass the internet to create real impact. When we arrogantly rely on trending topics and polls to tell us how the world feels, we do everyone a disservice and miss our mark. We must seek a deeper understanding of our tool set, and why the internet and cities are so out of touch with the rest of the country.
2. If you didn’t vote — you’re an idiot. If you voted for Gary Johnson or Jill Stein — it’s more complicated than when it was Ralph Nader and you would have been an idiot too — but you’re at best irresponsible.
3. Bigots did not decide this election. This election was won by appealing to reasonable, disenfranchised, previously silenced voices. Just like Brexit, they didn’t show up in the polls nor the trending topics, they lacked influential blogs, and didn’t organize rallies. But Twitter users with one million followers and one hundred followers each get one vote. Generations ago, white guys expected a certain lifestyle in America. Then, culture’s priority became women, black people, hispanics, homosexuals, all underrepresented minorities. Many of those white guys were assholes and deserved being cut off at the knees. Many of those white guys (I like to think of my grandfathers, father, brother and myself as five of them) have proudly collaborated with, championed and benefited from those minorities our entire lives. But there were a lot of regular white guys who undeservingly just had fewer chances than their parents. Nobody felt bad for them or listened to them. Until Donald Trump. That’s where all of those surprise mystery votes came from, not just racists, homophobes and misogynists. The Atlantic wrote a great article on it last year, we all ignored it and continued to say those white guys are racists.
4. Next two points boil down to: it doesn’t matter who you are deep down, or who you really are. We are our actions and we are only our actions.
5. We need deeper convictions about who we are. Identity is not a grab bag. We can’t walk into a culture and act part of it without time or work (read my Burning Man articles). Our world has become so easy, that it feels like we can be one person one day, and another the next. We’re cursed by choice — it prevents commitment, prevents growth, turns us into hypocrites, and dilutes our message. We can’t call people racists, homophobes, misogynists, and all types of bigots…but then use words like “b*tch” to describe women, and call people from the south “hillbillies,” talking about how they’re inbred. Melania Trump is currently trending on Twitter because people are mocking her by sharing nude pics (but “Free the Nipple”?). I saw a tweet tonight calling one of Trump’s supporters “racist bitch.” We cannot conveniently reinvent class and taste as it suits us in the moment, that doesn’t work. When I was 12, and just developing my first really close friendships with girls, I rewatched Godfather 2 (I remember being on a plane sitting across from my mom, watching on that old school Sony portable DVD player, we were flying to Rome, so I wanted to watch stuff related to Italians). When Mikey slapped Kay and called her “BITCH” I paused the movie, looked over at my Mom, thought of my friend Lauren whom another friend of mine had called a “bitch” recently because she “led him on,” and decided I should never use that word again and argue with anyone who does.
6. We need deeper convictions about our relationships. I’ve been having a heartbreaking ongoing dialog. I love everything about this friend, except that she has these pompous rich kid white guy friends. And they all voted for Trump. And she and I talked about it…a lot. And she kept saying “I still love them, they’re my boys,” when we thought Hillary was going to win in a landslide. And tonight she called me crying and lost for words. We can’t be the people we say we are, live the life we think we lead, and then associate with and vouch for people who represent so many opposed ideals. In the 60s, if you were protesting the war, but your best friend was for it, you resolved that discussion or you weren’t friends anymore. You probably just weren’t friends. Period. Otherwise that relationship could get you shot. Now, everything is so easy, we can have our cake, eat it on top of the Mexican wall while taking a selfie…but still say #FuckTrump. Artists get commended for getting brands’ money, no matter how disgusting the brand is. If Ivanka Trump threw a party most of my DJ friends would play it, as long as the rate was good and they got a mention in the Page 6 article. We’re kinda at war again now, and we need to re-adopt some of those 60s/70s mentalities. We are our convictions and we are our associations, there is no what’s deep down inside or who we really are and there is no it will all be ok in the end. With this guy in office, in an unprecedented position of power given that GOP has House, Senate and Supreme Court as well, this can very easily turn into life or death again. Our cushy internet lives might be in jeopardy. Think about who you are and think about who you want to be standing next to. Build your identity around that, and realize that only action matters.
7. Don’t feel bad for Hillary Clinton. She chose to lead us. She failed at achieving her goal. We failed her also, but the leader fails before the followers. Don’t argue about the popular vote, she won the popular vote as Democrats always do, because Liberals run up the margins in the Blue states. Mike Bloomberg and Joe Biden were sacrificed to pave the way for her. We excused major violations in favor of preserving her chances of victory. This battle with Trump was unprecedented, but don’t feel bad for her, she lost it. All of the things I said above are directed at her as much as anyone. I desperately wanted my kids (probably having kids sometime in the next 8 years) born with a female President and (admitting I’m very emotional right now while writing this) I can’t help but feel angry that she neglected crucial pieces of this campaign.
8. We can stop pretending Hillary Clinton was the President we all wanted and admit publicly we were really just members of the #NeverTrump party. I know MANY of you really, truly loved and supported her fully, but I was picking the best of a bad bunch and I wanted a female President for moral and progressive reasons. I really wanted a third term from Obama while we wait for Kanye to prepare for 2020. I’m not kidding at all, I will absolutely vote for him if he runs. I believe in Kanye. No jokes here. (regarding Kanye using “bitch,” for another article)
9. Don’t say you’re going to move to Canada or Mexico. 99% of you are just talking, and you’re annoying. The few that are serious, please, please please, don’t move. We need everyone.
10. There is no silver lining to tonight’s events, but there is a path forward. Kamala Harris was voted California Senator Elect by an historic margin.

NY and LA citizens (Chicago, Denver, Hartford, DC, Portland, Seattle, Minneapolis, Boston…) are no better than anyone else, but we made our stance clear with our vote, and we’re the most important people in the world right now, living at the most important time in our history. I was lucky enough to be in what I feel the most important room in the country tonight, where Kamala Harris celebrated winning her seat as California Senator Elect. She spoke of fighting.

I’m 32 years old. I’ve always felt nostalgia for times that had more of a cause. The most important thing I’ve ever felt a part of was the emergence of Dance music culture into the mainstream. But my role model growing up was Danny Fields, who lived Punk rock, and I have experienced nothing close to the importance that Punk played in culture. I’ve never bled for anything. Well, friends, now’s the fucking time. 11/9 (Hillary conceded after midnight) is the worst day since fucking 9/11. Not a joke, but a sick, nightmarish, fucked up coincidence.

This fight isn’t about being aggressive or loud or transgressive though. It’s about listening. We already have the power, the voice, the platform. We can do anything we set our minds and resources to. We didn’t lose this election because someone overpowered us. We lost the election because we thought we were alone and neglected others and other ways of life. We need to listen to the rest of the country now, and understand what happened and who these people are. We must figure out how we can work together with those people to meet middle ground, and then expand upon it. These aren’t aliens (like not from outer space and not from other countries), these are regular people, and Americans just like us. We act like we’re so different, and felt untouchable for generations. Well, it happened, so we’re forced to come together now and figure shit out. It would have been much easier if we did it on our own, but it took this disaster to force us into it. Unfortunately, we’re also left with a megalomaniac as the most powerful most powerful man in the world in history (again, he has the House, Senate and Supreme Court behind him), so we have our work cut out for us.

I think we may be in a better spot than ever with bigots. They won. They got what they wanted. Now they don’t need to hide, they’re safe to take their hoods off. They don’t need to find a homosexual in a dark alley to assault him, they can laugh at him in public. They don’t need to pretend to respect their female boss, they can openly go over her head and take her job. These are all absolute horrors, yes. But putting these horrors on the surface gives us an opportunity to examine them like never before, and do it together. If we self-proclaimed cultural elites are truly the deep, progressive thinkers and connectors we claim to be, we can approach these human beings with maturity and sensitivity, and gain more understanding, perhaps grow beyond the difference and hate. Another way to think about it…if you don’t like the idea of approaching these bigots with respect…sorry, we lost…we’ve all just been cut off at the knees and this is our only option. We fought against them and lost.

If you don’t know anything about politics, but love reading NY Times, Twitter, going to #BlackLivesMatter rallies, and are completely flummoxed by how this all happened and want to do something about it…just look up Kamala Harris, and get started following along with her leadership. Get involved.

More importantly, go to a red state and talk to people. Talk to Trump voters. Ask them about their lives. Don’t challenge them or shame them. Openly talk to them and ask them questions the way you know how to.

P.S. Oh, let’s not get it twisted though, I don’t mean the rich white dudes…fuck those guys still. And the racists, homophobes, misogynists and xenophobes. Fuck all of them. I’m trying to focus on the positive, but don’t think I’m not mad and sad as hell about what happened tonight. I hate those motherfuckers just as much as the rest of you do. I’m just saying they didn’t really have anything to do with what happened tonight.