Thoughts on Burning Man Part Three (3/3): On Open-Mindedness and Dan Bilzerian
“In the absence of facts, we tell ourselves stories.” — Noah Hawley (in his great new book Before the Fall)
“You’re closed-minded unless you’re open-minded the way I am” — Somebody. Probably.
I love Burning Man.
Just as every human should live in New York for at least a year, every human should go to Burning Man once. It’s unlike anything you’ll ever experience.
I do Burning Man differently.
I don’t wear costumes. I texted to find people. I Snapped a lot. On my laptop, I watched the finale of “The Night Of. I don’t do drugs. I don’t meditate. I don’t do yoga. I eat gluten and dairy. I don’t hook up with anyone. I had no revelatory life-changing experiences. No enlightenment reached.
Well maybe if you tried it our way you would reach enlightenment.
I’m good. Life is awesome. I’m constantly creating, more in touch with my relationships than ever, and I feel a profound sense of self awareness. I unplug regularly, focus constantly, achieve “flow” regularly. I thankfully do not require catharsis from pain that the Temple represents for some.
I know some consider me less-than for not achieving the same enlightenment they do, and I’m criticized for the way I “Burn.”
I’d say “judged” but I don’t want to invoke the negative connotation that I’ve already criticized. Wow crazy semantics. How do I describe an action best described with a word whose association with the action I reject?
It’s more passive aggression, and internally I react I know what you’re thinking, you don’t think I’m one of you, I get it, I’ll walk away, it’s cool.
Certain People I Know (purposeful Morrissey reference) have adopted a certain lifestyle. It’s become rabidly trendy. Williamsburg-chic has taken over the world, but Burning Man-chic is right behind it.
Boho chic with a dash of steam punk. Drapey dresses parading Abbot-Kinney. Thin, drapey scarves with tons of extra fabric wrapped thrice around to protect against those Bushwick winters. A few extra open buttons on the drapey buttoned down shirt. Vests. Hair shaved on the sides, slicked back or Man-Bun’d on top. Tousled locks, carefully treated and styled looks masquerading as bedhead. Braids. Cover the belly button, but proudly display the two-pack (admittedly that’s everyone, not just this scene).
They go to talks and conferences. They acknowledge gurus and read their self-help books, often following their seminars. They give talks. They write self-help guru books, or on Medium or Huffington Post if they don’t want to be bogged down by all the steps it takes to publish a book. They’re nutritionists (unlicensed). They teach Yoga. They consult, bringing together brands and creators. They’re amateur photographers. They develop something brand new that solves a problem nobody knew we had until they told us. They talk about the future.
They have 4.6 stars on Uber.
Then there’s successful entrepreneur subset. They look the same and hang together, but one of them has networked into this curated, intimate, catered dinner, could not otherwise pay for it, and the other is an equity shareholder in a business sponsoring the dinner to build buzz around their new startup.
They are symbiotic. Entrepreneurs use pretty people to attract investors and market startups, and the community use entrepreneurs for guest rooms, free meals and a general fancy pants lifestyle on $24k cobbled together salary.
This relationship is crucial to the system’s survival. Codes are built and upheld. Ideas delineated as the way and taboo. Yoga, vegan, meditation, sunsets, mushrooms, Richard Branson — good. Judgment, words on clothes, monogamy, Snapchat, Gluten, Kanye West — bad. Drumpf — bad. Bernie — still the best, Goonies never say die.
Every individual and scene needs a code. They change, they evolve, they contradict themselves, they include and exclude, it’s all good.
But one of the most important pillars of this community is OPEN-MINDEDNESS.
You can’t create an extremely well-defined, symbol-filled, even hierarchal community with ideology that clearly fits and doesn’t, is allowed and isn’t — and still claim open-mindedness.
Open-mindedness is flexibility, consideration for new ideas and ability to adapt and change. These Burners are typically just talking about non-traditional lifestyles. Radical and different is not open-minded.
I break their codes constantly, and receive passive aggression in return. The alienation or exclusion does not bother me. The patronizing, pompous attitudes, the condescension, the moral high-ground, high and mighty, the holier-than-thou preachiness…aaaaaahhhhh!!!!
Caroliiiine (intentional Three Stacks reference)!!!!
Smell yourself already.
Burners’ supposed open-mindedness is different version of closed-mindedness.
You’re closed-minded unless you’re open-minded the way I am.
Burners are not as open to The Other as they say. They are an Other, but then they live by a strict code. They preach an enlightenment, and those not listening are living wrong.
This is absolutely not everyone, but a certain set of very loud Burners. Many are the same poseurs I spoke of.
Judgment, cliques, and exclusion do not bother me.
Appropriation does.
Dan Bilzerian has a code. Bilzerian has an identity. Bilzerian is who he is and that’s an original. He didn’t invent his iconography, but he scaled it and took ownership of it. He’s now the poster boy of post-frat lifestyle.
Dan Bilzerian is about tits, guns, poker, money, cocaine, white girl’s tits, bottles, boats, light skinned Black girl’s tits, planes, tits, guns, tits, light skinned Latina girl’s tits, ass, tits, light skinned mixed race girl’s tits, guns, strippers, porn stars, Instagram models, tits, guns, ass, tits, tits, tits, poker, coke, guns, white girl Instagram models’ tits, white girls with huge tits in bikinis drinking bottles on a boat firing guns at stacks of money won from poker being thrown in the air inside of a night club in Las Vegas and Dubai at the same damn time with Future actually rapping live while doing coke off a light skinned Black girl’s tits sippin lean at the same. damn. time. Incredible, Future. Good on ya!
I’m not invited on that boat. I’m totally ok with this. He is too. We are all exactly who we are and where we’re supposed to be in this arrangement.
Burning Man was founded on principles that everyone is welcome, equal and completely open-minded…but then we look up at the bus and there’s just a bunch of skinny six-foot European models in cat suits and rich 35–60 year old men.
Many of the same you’ll see in Dan Bilzerian’s Instagrams.
I’m not mad at the models nor the dudes recruiting them, Burning Man expanded and things change. It happens.
Just admit there’s a two-bottle minimum with a ratio.
The real Burners can coexist with the poseur Burners if the poseurs own up to what they are. Nobody will shame you for it. It’s actually more impressive! You can build this incredible business and live this regular lifestyle most of the time, but then you can also party like crazy and get all these hot girls. That’s cool, own it. And you won’t even fear ruining your credibility anymore.
All problems are fixed when you admit you’re the same as Dan Bilzerian.
And let the real Burners have their identity.
