The Hermit

Sean Anthony Lopez
Jul 25, 2017 · 2 min read

(Prelude)

How do you describe a man who lives solely for himself? What are some words that come to mind? I have searched the dictionary from cover to cover in pursuit of the word.

Self-absorbed? Egocentric? Self-centered?

These words are predominantly used with negative connotation. They describe an individual who is selfish and uninterested in other people’s concerns.

Can a man who lives only for himself be anything but selfish?

Why not self-directed? Free from external control or constraint in action or judgement.

Autonomous? Independent and not controlled by others or by outside forces.

Finally, I settled on the word, “hermit.”

Why?

To define it plainly:

“one who retires from society and lives in solitude”

A hermit can be both autonomous and self-directed (two words that already seem precariously synonymous). Yet, a hermit is also egocentric. Concerned only for himself, his feelings and desires. He is self-centered and self-absorbed.

He is not a hedonist, for a hermit does not take to solitude in pursuit of pleasure. He is not a narcissist, for a hermit’s interest in himself is not excessive.

The hermit escapes the labels placed on him by society choosing instead to find descriptions that he believes accurately describe him. In so doing the hermit recognizes that he is a mix of both the positive and negative words associated with living a life of solitude.

This, however, does not free the hermit from having worldly concerns. It does not stop his mind from pondering over relationships, politics, social issues, psychology, human growth, violence, or topics of mortality and finitude.

As secluded as the hermit may make himself…he cannot deny that he exists as a part of the world. A world that he can seldom share with others. A world that demands itself be forced upon him.

The hermit cannot escape reality. He can only view it from behind his own eyes. A location that the hermit has turned into sanctuary. A location that the world would call a prison.

This makes the hermit angry and sad.

So he sees the world as cold and painful…

Or perhaps, the world is only the reflection of his own iciness and pain.

It matters not…

For as much as I would like to consider myself a wise and compassionate hermit, unmarred and free from worldly influences, I am not.

I am a young, ignorant and lonely boy at war with himself over topics of identity, emotion and spiritual fulfillment.

This is life as I can describe it.

I don’t give a fuck about what you think.

Sean Anthony Lopez

Written by

Poetry, philosophy, and short stories

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