‘Yob Nation’

I’ve just finished reading Francis Gilbert’s Yob Nation. The book gives first-hand accounts of how ‘yobbish’ behaviour can be seen in nearly every level of society. No longer applying just to the stereotypical image of the shaven-headed lager-fuelled football fan, Gilbert describes how City traders, politicians and students in lecture theatres often exhibit this behaviour.
I found the section on how a person’s upbringing can lead to this behaviour particularly interesting. Gilbert interviews a wide-range of people from different backgrounds. The common themes show a link between certain styles of parenting and negative behaviour.
In some respects, Gilbert’s findings are not surprising. One case study mentioned is a teenage boy who intimidates his mother to the extent that she was scared to reprimand him because of how he would react.
In my own work as a teacher in a Pupil Referral Unit, I have seen what happens when a child grows up with virtually no boundaries. Even when they are not causing havoc you can see it. With a few exceptions, the following examples illustrate the sort of pupil I encountered: they are unwilling or unaware of the need to adapt their speech depending on the situation, they push past if you are in the way, they don’t consider the feelings of others.
When you witness this behaviour from young people, you can see how, at night on the streets, with their friends, under the influence of alcohol or drugs, they would indulge in yobbish behaviour.
However, Gilbert also shows how the authoritarian parenting can have negative consequences for a young person’s behaviour.
Authoritarian
The author spoke to two reformed characters who caused havoc on the streets but behaved well at home under the watchful eye of their respective fathers. They were very strict and not averse to giving their kids a backhander if they stepped out of line.
One lad said that when this happened, there was ‘no discussion’. According to Gilbert this lack of discussion as well as the physical punishment is a problem as it ‘does not teach a child the power of empathy or rationality’.
While the threat of a whack might make a lot of youngsters think again before making a cheeky comment, they focus on the punishment THEY will receive rather than the effect their behaviour has on others.
I strongly feel that you should discuss with your child WHY their behaviour is wrong. How do they think their brother/sister feels now you’ve said that to them etc. It forces them to analyse their behaviour and consider things from another person’s point of view.
This is what they take with them into the big wide world. When they are in charge of their own behaviour, a lack of consideration for others is dangerous. An authoritarian approach may work at home but the evidence suggests this is not the case when the authority figure is moved. Again, one of Gilbert’s case studies sums it up: As soon as I left my dad’s house I felt that was it…I was free as a bird.’
In my years working with young people, I hadn’t appreciated this type of parenting as a contributor to ‘yobbish’ behaviour. From the older generation, we often hear the phrase ‘it never did me any harm’ and a lot of people feel that the fewer boundaries there seem to be these days is the ultimate contributor to bad behaviour. However, It also seems that there was little communication, little explanation about why a child had crossed the line. How is a child supposed to learn why something is wrong if it isn’t discussed with them at a young enough age?
But maybe the main reason young people behaved better was out of fear rather than consideration for others. Fear of the cane at school, and fear of the belt at home. Nowadays, perhaps the ‘lack of respect’ that people state is the problem is really a lack of fear. Authority figures in the past; the police, teachers, parents even, were feared much more than they are today. The problem was that although it helped keep people in line, these institutions of authority were not held to account in the way they are today. In recent years in the UK there has been an uncovering of abuse scandals involving politicians and showbiz figures. In many cases, this abuse went on for many years as victims felt that by speaking out they would not have been taken seriously.
While authority figures should be held to account where necessary, I would agree that there is a ‘lack of respect’ these days for authority. But I don’t think the answer is to bring back corporal punishment. I think the ‘lack of respect’ is really a lack of empathy for both authority and for those below you on the hierarchy. The same kids I’ve had cheek from as a teacher are the same kids I’ve seen intimidate and demean smaller, weaker kids. Punching up as well as punching down.
Perhaps the solution is to teach empathy at a very young age. It won’t work in 100% of the time, but what does? Teach kids to treat everyone with respect, whether it’s a police officer, a teacher, a shopkeeper or an old lady in front of them on the pavement. Enforcing boundaries are important of course. Schools still do it and parents can do their bit by withdrawing privileges.
Whacking someone around the head won’t teach them empathy. The middle aged man who cut me up in traffic the other day would certainly have been old enough to have been on the receiving end of corporal punishment at school. Did violence teach him to respect other road users?
Although I admit, for a brief second I wanted to go over to his car and give it another try.