Are you talking to me?

I am a self-confessed geek. That’s right, I started interacting with computers from about 12 (yes,we had computers back then, though they were huge, hot and had a mighty roar). Then I got a degree in how to talk to them (we called it coding) and I started working among them in a past century. Why am I saying this? Because that tends to indicate that I am very familiar with electronics and I can read or write a complex technical manual. However, I may not have spent a lot of time developing human to human interaction.
And that is pretty common. The thing with me you see is that I have the excuse of being a geek, the IT guy. What is your excuse?
Ok, sorry I just pretended you can’t speak to people. But actually, are you sure you can?
Communication is this rather underrated skill, rarely developed by itself, and yet essential in pretty much everything we do. And the more it becomes electronic, the more we tend to forget the #1 and most crucial rule of all: that communication is a mere tool applied and used to reach an outcome.
Communication is a mere tool applied and used to reach an outcome.
As a tool, it must be effective. That does not mean pretty colors, good looking presenter, sexy accent (thank god I got one of those), or passionate musical background. Whichever means you choose to use, the same applies: it is all about the result you seek.
And every single time, by simple virtue of communication being an interactive tool, the result will heavily depends on the people who are in a position to give it to you. Let’s call them the audience.
The audience is simply the means to get the result you want. See it as an instrument if you will. Whether it is a single person or a large group, there are ways to obtain what you seek from them. And that comes with adapting to your audience. See? All is coming together nicely.
So back to the title. Are you talking to me? Because if you are, you must adapt to me, to the way I like to be talked to, to what really get me off on one, to what makes me smile… know me, know how I react to various things and you have a pretty good chance to get what you ask for — as long of course I can actually grant it to you.
Here is a checklist of what to do to ensure good result in your communication:
- Know who your audience is going to be
- Learn about them, they style they respond to. For instance, talk to those who recently interacted with them, check their linkedin style of writing, use emails or phone calls to get some better ideas.
- Prepare your communication based on the above.
- Before the interaction, use that tiny space of small talk and introduction to assess them further.
- Adapt communication if you saw something during the introduction.
- Throughout the communication, read them. I mean just that: read their reaction. Do they smile at your joke? or scorn? Former: keep doing it. Latter: stop, even maybe apologise at the end.
- If you are losing them, do not stick to the script. Adapt, move on. Are they on a schedule? Skip bits and deliver the punch line.
All in all think about fishing: hooking is easy, reeling is where the skills come to life.
Of course, you will argue that you don’t always know your audience in advance. True. If you have no chance of knowing before hand, or if you have a diverse group, then try this:
- Improvise (especially effective with one to one dialogue)
- Use a series of techniques. Mix it up, bit of story-telling, some figures, true facts, graphs, photos… Tell the story using 3 or 4 methods, everybody will find something to like.
For very large groups, point 2 above will help you. Use google to find very inspiring speeches from history and go through them. I bet you will find they were using a mixture of techniques… Start with “I have a dream”. The sentence is used many times, but every time it is followed with something different. A personal story, a solemn quote, a political statement, a revolutionary plea… whoever you were listening to it at the time, there would have been something for you.
As a last note, don’t just develop your skills through the corporate training mindset, go beyond. Here are a couple of tips that can help you go beyond the typical “how to present effectively” trade:
- Learn improv’ and stand up techniques.
- Learn cold reading: tarot and psychic readers techniques
This last one is not a joke. Would you feel confident taking legal tender from a random person by reading their hand? Without being sued or punched in the face? Believe me, the skills that allow cold readers to do that are priceless in corporate communication.
Feel free to comment and share. Press the heart if you like. And please join me next Thursday for a new article.

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Seb Giroux is a consultant, author and entrepreneur who has run a variety of IT services and departments for 20 years. His latest book, The IT Leader’s Manual (Dux Publishing, 2016), provides hands-on tips and a personal framework for IT leaders.
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