Confusion on the Relationship Battlegrounds

The Sure-Fire Way for Miscommunication to Ruin Everything

August 9, 2016–10:27 PM

“Hello I’m Katie”
“Why hello Katie”

The two phrases that will eventually lead to painfully confusing mishap in a friendship and “relationship” that may never see the end.

Through out my entire 17; soon to be a damned 18, years of my life, never have I once been more confused by a male and female at the same time. Now don’t get me wrong, both are great but I have had my fair share of confusing “soon to be relationship” moments. You know, that kind of “talking” stage where you aren’t sure if anything will go anywhere but you sure as hell hope it does. Well in my case, it happened between a guy that I met through a friend, a best friend.

August 9, Tuesday, it was going phenomenal.

My friend — whose name will be changed for privacy sake — Jane(pretty basic huh), we were downtown taking some “artistic” shots of the buildings. Though on out way back home she decided she would whip out her good old handy cellular device and hit up the classic Snapchat. But oh! This was no normal snap of the chats, no no, this was to a guy. A special guy. A particularly cute fellow who I began to take interest in. So being the nosy outgoing snob that I am I said,

“Hey, uh mind if I have his number?”

Of course Jane insisted I had all of his social media account usernames along with his number so I accepted diligently and went on my way to contact him.

Now, this part is key to understand or else this story would be down right pointless.

I had no idea that Jane liked, lets say his name is John to go along with the Law and Order missing victim theme of names. So Jane liked John and that is where the whole “Katie likes a guy” idea just went down the drain.

August 13, 2016–10:20

“Hey do you wanna go with me to visit John?”

Don’t do it Katie, say no, avoid the situation you know it will be weird.


Shit. Shit Katie look what you did now! There is no going back now Jane is on her way to get you, if you change your plans then she will for sure think somethings up. But don’t worry too much it can’t be that bad.

We headed down south, and I mean south, about an hour from my house just to go see this John guy.

The car ride was normal, we did all the things that best friends do on road trips. We blasted music and laughed our asses off. But it felt as though the closer we got the weirder the atmosphere became, besides the fact that it looked like a scene from children of the corn and those small heathens could jump out at any moment and kill us. No, she started to call John and she talked to him and did the things thats girls do when they talk to someone they like, the thing where we raise our voices slightly and act a little ditzy because, well, honestly because society.

Then the time came.

We pulled up into the smallest building I have ever seen in my life. This little shop in the middle of God knows where with the only thing in the one mile radius being a McDonalds and some weird family owned car shop. So we walk in go say hey to this John guy and he decides we should go to the best place to take two female friends. McDonalds.

Oh yeah, the boy took us to McDonalds. We walked in, they ordered food, I sat awkwardly in the backdrop of the scene hoping no one would ask me if I wanted anything to eat, and we sat down. John took his seat first then I went in to sit by him.

Mistake number one.

Jane nipped that in the butt like a bad habit. Not only was I left on the opposing side, but it was the opposing side that watched the home team make all kinds of plays that couples do.

The twirling of the hair while he talked.

The slow way of eating food so he didn’t think she was fat.

The “ever so sudden” bumping of the arms.

And to top the cake, the hitting of the arms. Ah yes, the timeless way to show someone you like them by hitting them. So much affection and care just radiating out of that small McDonalds booth.

So why didn’t I think anything of it?


  1. I liked him(So obviously I’m the only one who can like him right?)
  2. Jane just dumped her boyfriend and swore she wasn’t looking.

Any one can understand that when you like someone nothing really matters because you automatically view yourself as the, in the view of society’s aspects on relationships, “prime realtor” of that person. Yeah, that sounds terrible, but most relationships revolving around high school kids are pretty horrid to begin with.

August 16, 2016–3:30 PM

“This girl in (blank) doesn’t like me because John likes me[…]”
“Wait what[…] So John likes you”
“From what I know yes, Why?”

Nice right? That she tells me a week later to the day that she like the guy that I have started falling for. Not even an easy trip, try again, it was a trip that caused me to scrape up my knees(How about that cliche!)

There was no warning, no time to think it was just a big slap in the boob reminding me that I will more than likely have to deal with being alone for a few years. Seeing that Jane is a very good friend, I couldn’t just say that I was the one who fell for him first, that I had dibs on him before her. Could I?

Well of course I could have but I sure as hell couldn’t bring myself to do it.

No way could I crush her feelings even though she just did that to her now ex boyfriend. The one she told, along with me, that she wan’t looking for anyone. But we all know that thats a load of bull because the only reason anyone isn’t “looking” is if they are:

1. In a relationship

2. Happily married(well thats a relationship)

3. Just not interested in ever being with another human

Thus, I decided that when Jane brought up

“You seem upset?”

To just drop and abandon all feelings on the side of the road where I somewhat found them in the first place.

Now that I see all of her snapchats, ironic(?), regarding this John fellow the confusion just grows stronger and stronger by the hour. How could I manage to miss such a what should be obvious thing? How could my two best friends that I’ve been giving play by play updates to miss this?

Miscommunication? Is it possible? Where could it have even began?

The only logical thing that could come to mind is that maybe my tone just wasn’t what I thought is was when I approached Jane about John. But was it my fault?

Hell no.

Thats what I should be saying but in all reality, there is always some part of it that could be and probably is your own fault.

But no, no its not my fault. There is no good reasoning that will make me or my fellow play by play friends that could make me or them conclude that this was my fault. I still to this day do not understand any of it completely and it blows my mind that Jane and Johns are about to start dating, if not already(who the hell knows).

If there is any type of “miscommunication”, which I am saying with the lightest grain of salt that is imaginable, it has to be all on them. Miscommunication isn’t always a two way street and in this case it it that one way street that goes through all of downtown that pisses you off more and more each time you try and go down it. Then you realize it just isn’t going to happen unless you want to get slammed into by the oncoming traffic. You continue to try an avoid it but the damn thing just keeps coming back to bite you each time you try and take another street, always popping up.