a mug of water and an apology for nonsense
Today, as I poured myself a glass of water from an acquaintance’s cup in a dimly-lit room, I noticed that the act felt slightly off and abnormal.
It’s not like I’ve never poured myself a cup of water before; on the contrary, as a kid I would sneak into my kitchen during the pitch-black hours of the night and pour myself some water from my designated tiger-striped mug without even needing to turn on the lights. I would stick my mug under the faucet and let it run, listening for the pitch of the noise from the water hitting the inside of the cup to rise until it reached a certain pitch and then shutting off the faucet.
However, pouring myself a mug of water in this person’s house felt different. I wasn’t used to pouring water from a Brita filter, and I didn’t know the maximum pitch of noise that I could reach before this cup would run over. There were too many new factors in a new and unfamiliar environment.
And so I poured myself a glass of water in the dim light, pausing slightly every few seconds to check the level of the water before continuing onwards until I had a mug of water filled less than I was normally used to.
I think this experience is a somewhat fitting metaphor for my transition from high school to college. The switch in environments felt unfamiliar, and suddenly I lacked what confidence I had in my ability to do anything.
- It’s okay to take baby steps.
- It’s okay to take a break and check if everything’s okay.
- It’s okay if I don’t achieve as much in the beginning. Things take time, and I’ll fall into a comfortable rhythm soon enough.
- It’s okay to feel unsure, uneasy, and/or uncomfortable.
- It’s okay if you need someone’s help to shine a light on some things.
- It’s okay.
Same work, same tasks, same objectives; new places, new hardships, new failures.
I pray that through these new encounters, I will continue to listen and depend on Him.