Steve McGrath
Aug 23, 2017 · 4 min read

Alternatively, I would recommend that they join forces with the “intellectually stunted” and refuse to accept the paper cup of poisoned Kool-aid that quixotic progressives like yourself are encouraging them to drink.

You would have them believe that they are fast approaching a jobless future due to the rapid technological advancement of automation and AI. I would argue that progressives like yourself should temper your intellectual curiosities and enthusiasm for a work-free utopian society and contemplate the economic and social realities of your eccentric proposals.

Due to the snail’s pace of product development, customer adoption and social acceptance of technological evolution, we will likely be colonizing distant planets before we reach this nexus. Consequently, all the contemporary millennials you coerce into extolling the virtues of your immaculate progression will have died in poverty while waiting for America’s one-percenters to agree to surrender 70% of their wealth to finance their Universal Basic Income (UBI).

Technology for Automated Teller Machines has existed for over a half-century but we are only now seeing significant job erosion for human tellers. I personally still prefer to walk my money into the bank for deposits with a smile from Rebecca or Erin who always engage me with polite conversation while they handle my transaction. And how about the 30 years of technological progress devoted to those #@*& unreliable self-checkout machines that now populate our local grocers. I would rather wait 15 minutes for a manual checkout than scan my own groceries on those impersonal and uncooperative clunkers.

When reviewing debates on the promise of automation, I rarely find introspective discussions that evaluate the potential for social acceptance of automated technologies. Full automation is inimical to the human condition. Highly emotional mammalians are not genetically predisposed to rely on machines for their safety, security, health and appetite. This is why I refuse to jump out of airplanes or scuba dive at depths greater than 120' deep. If I die, I don’t want it to be the result of equipment failure.

For the same reasons, I also have no interest in surrendering my organs to a fully automated surgery procedure without a trained doctor present to monitor the operation. And who has ever enjoyed eating fully automated food? If, on the other hand, they can perfect a fully automated poop scooper, I’m all in!!

FULLY-AUTOMATED POOPER SCOOPER

I continue to read stories from alarmist tech-media outlets prophesying imminent doom and gloom for truckers due to the rapid deployment of self-driving rigs. Invariably, these alarmist articles always seem to allocate a paragraph or two to the necessity of implementing UBI to offset job losses. It is ridiculous to suggest that the loss of jobs in the trucking industry will be the catalyst that convinces hardworking Americans to cast their vote for an ‘agent of change’ who intends to triple their taxes.

The trucking industry can’t find enough drivers now because most people are not willing to spend three weeks away from home confined to a cramped metal cab. Of course, the trucking industry still lacks regulatory approval to deploy headless rigs in many states and competent robots than can offload the cargo and deliver invoices to waiting customers have not been developed.

Security issues will also be a paramount concern to owners of self driving rigs carrying valuable cargo. I expect that cyber thieves are already hard at work developing computer code that can disable a headless rig in close proximity to an awaiting crew that will take possession of the its contents and flee before authorities can respond.

Please do not misunderstand me. I am a friend of the machine and believe they make us speedier and smarter workers. I joined the Architecture profession when drawings were still being produced by hand, so I have experienced the evolution of computer aided design from the early 2D drafting software through the development of Building Information Modeling (BIM). The evolution of BIM in our profession automates document production processes through the parametric linkage of metadata.

The company that sold us our new BIM software ($$$) assured us that it would enable our practice to produce design and construction documents more efficiently. However, he failed to note that advanced training and expert computer skills were required to operate it. Consequently, my partner and I are no longer able to advance our designs on the company computers so we have hired two young BIM technicians from Va. Tech. to input our design concepts for us.

Unfortunately, our youthful BIM techies have not yet acquired a sufficient knowledge of building codes or design and construction methodologies, so we must constantly check their work for errors. The time required for this continuous and careful supervision is impacting our other work and we are now contemplating adding another Architect to our staff to supervise them. Therefore, the partial automation of our firm’s production has created three new jobs.

Despite our unanticipated employment and overhead growth, we expect that this is a temporary annoyance resulting from our transition to automation. I fully expect that I will soon be able to connect a computer to my brain and capture mental design imagery and other useful information for company projects while resting on my terrace with a cool beverage in hand. Hopefully, this technology will be available before you and your progressive comrades comprise the majority of the US electorate and enact policies that will ensure our mutual self-destruction.

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    Steve McGrath

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    Mammalian; rounded braincase; thick skull balanced on a vertical backbone

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