One for You and Me, One for You and He, and One for the Wall In-Between
Suddenly the analogy appeared like a flash exposure in my head. Each time around we’re dealing out emotional energy like cards to each of the three groups, like players in a poker game; gambling a little here, winning a little there, losing over here…the wall is winning.
It’s been years now since what started as a little flimsy caution tape began to take on its true shape. It’s gotten older and stronger and harder as it becomes every bit as much a part of all of our relationships’ dynamics as anything else. We spend more of our hearts building this wall than any other thing we’ve built between all of us. The wall is high enough to make it impossible to see over, and thick enough that it’s impossible to hear or know what’s going on on the other side.
The wall takes up space: space in our hearts, space in our time, time in our heads, and it’s becoming our defining institution. It grows large from huge carved blocks of cold stone, COVENANT carved deep on one side.
The wall is a wall against hospitality and warmth. We deal it in and it keeps winning, getting bigger, growing sturdier. Once we’re done with the game part how much will we have left and how much will just be that stupid wall between all of us?
I’d love to be building a hearth instead, near what’s left of our humble dinged up kitchen table, that we can all sit around and laugh and love, and where the only walls are the ones on the outside of all of us.