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The Indescribable Complexity of Being

A close friend recently filmed a Facebook Live video on the characteristics of GenXers, those of us born between 1965 and 1979. As I watched her describe some of the key characteristics of my generation, I nodded along — yes I was a latch-key child, very independent, always had an entrepreneurial spirit.

Consider then, how my being born into a specific generation intersects with my gender, a time when girls were receiving messages of empowerment from mothers who had been actively engaged in the women’s rights movement.

Now layer on my Myers Briggs type — INFJ, considered to be one of the rarest types. Read any post entitled, ‘12 characteristics of the INFJ personality' and it’s like I wrote it myself.

I’m an artist and a teacher, from a family of artists and teachers. I’ve always had a strong connection to animals and the natural world.

I grew up in Oregon, but lived in several different regions of the U.S. which provided me with a cross-sectional perspective on American culture. I’ve been a world traveler, yet there are still so many places I want to visit. Including a trip to outer space, which is the pinnacle of my bucket list. Can you just imagine the humbling experience of looking out over our entire world at once?

Five years ago, I discovered I am a highly sensitive person — a deep thinker, intuitive and very heart connected. I also identify as an empath, capable of experiencing others’ emotions like they are my own.

And then there’s my lifelong path as a spiritual seeker, studying numerous religious and spiritual traditions. Seeking connection between the common threads in mankind’s search for deeper meaning.

This indescribable complexity of being — it’s a shared human condition. Call it the reason that we each seem to be compelled at some point to dive deep into the key question:

Who am I?

Layers upon layers upon layers that make up our identities plus that extra something special. Our unique Divine spark that surpasses definition.

What if we’re supposed to be asking slightly different questions?

Like, who am I becoming? Or, what new level of consciousness am I rising up to? What path is emerging for me? Do I trust my inner knowing to courageously step forward?

What if we never really know exactly who we are? What if in every moment we are simply making micro-shifts into a slightly higher awareness and maturity? Hmm, identity as a constantly moving target, very interesting…

So what’s it like to explore your complexity of being?

First, it requires attentive self-observation. Notice I didn’t say self-criticism, which is a different thing altogether. A self-observant person celebrates their strengths, is aware of where they need to improve and understands we all have blind spots — that shadowy area where we just can’t see what we don’t yet know.

Second, when we observe an incongruence in our behavior, our words or beliefs, we become curious. What am I supposed to be learning at this moment? What patterns and synchronicities are lining up? Where might I be in resistance to who I am becoming?

Finally, we tap into our deep, inner knowing as a guidepost for moving forward.

We learn to trust our heart.