I have been having very vivid dreams lately, probably due to a combination of sleep-deprivation, getting over a cold, and a little anxiety. I worked my last shift BBC (Before Breast Cancer) this week, and mercifully, it was not overwhelmingly crazy. But there is a patient that often comes in that is frankly, an asshole, and doesn’t allow the nurses to take his vitals, and refuses to get dressed, all while screaming rudely and demanding his dilaudid IV. In ER speak, he is a drug seeker. And every time I see him, I get flustered that I can’t just tell him to leave, but end up relenting and giving him what he wants, akin to taking an order at the McDonald’s drive thru. But this time, I dreamed I went to his room and stood there, arms crossed, and calmly said, “shitty things happen to nice people, and you, sir, should take solace in knowing that you are spared.”

I awoke and for a second wondered if I really said that. Then I wished I had said that. That may be my response ABC (After Breast Cancer).