A strong friendship is essential to our mental and emotional well-being. When we have unbreakable social bonds with those around us, we are undeniably happier and healthier. With a great friend by our side, we can meet just about any challenge that life throws at us.
Similarly, we want to be the person that our friends can depend on, in good times and rough. But what exactly is the definition of a good friend? And how can we become one? Without a clear sense of what makes a strong friendship, it’s easy to miss out on how to be a good friend to the people in your life.
So let’s explore the key qualities of a friend, and learn how to cultivate these in yourself. As you read the list below, consider how these values are also ones to look out for in other people, especially when meeting new friends.
1. Empathy
“One friend, one person who is truly understanding, who takes the trouble to listen to us as we consider a problem, can change our whole outlook on the world.” — E. H. Mayoli
Among all the traits of a good friend, empathy is easily one of the most important. It involves having an understanding of your friends’ experiences, emotions and hardships.
To be a good friend, you must be able to put yourself in the shoes of others, especially those closest to you. You must recognize how your friend is feeling, and interact and respond accordingly. Only with empathy are you able to help your friend through the tough situations they might be going through.
2. Loyalty
“There are ‘friends’ who destroy each other, but a real friend sticks closer than a brother.” — Proverbs 18:24 NLT
No matter how tough times may get — having a loyal friend on our side makes challenges seem less daunting. Believe it or not, it’s just as important to have a loyal friend as it is to have a loyal partner.
To cultivate loyalty in yourself, you need to make friendship a priority. Allow your friends to know that you will be by their side no matter what. It’s all about staying faithful to your relationship in bad times, good times, forever and always. A loyal friend never avoids picking up their phone when their friend is in need of their help or advice.
3. Trust
“The best way to find out if you can trust somebody is to trust them.” — Ernest Hemingway
Trust is often the ‘make or break’ quality in many close relationships. As Nate Battle mentioned, “a good friend is someone you can trust to keep the personal information you shared with them private and not share it with anyone or gossip about it.”
Mutual trust allows us to feel safe with our friends. When it comes to yourself, learning to trust your friend enough to share personal struggles, challenges and problems with them is key to building a healthy friendship.
4. Honesty
“Being honest may not get you a lot of friends but it’ll always get you the right ones.” — John Lennon
Healthy and mature friendships are built on honesty, and these friendships continue to grow only if the friends stay true to each other. Friends should be able to speak openly from the heart and tell you the truth.
To cultivate honesty in yourself: try as much as possible to be honest with your friends, rather than trying to comfort them with a lie. But being honest is not just about expressing problems and issues. You should also be honest to friends about the things they are good at, or things you like about them!
5. Respect
“Make improvements, not excuses. Seek respect, not attention.” — Roy T. Bennett
Every true friendship requires mutual respect. Good friends should respect each other for the hard work and determination they displayed while achieving whatever goal they have. Almost all of your friends have achieved something that deserves to be celebrated. Find out what it is and acknowledge it.
But respect isn’t just about showing admiration for your friend’s efforts. To be a good friend, you should respect the other person’s boundaries, and acknowledge their limitations without trying to pressure them into anything.
Empathy, Loyalty, Trust, Honesty and Respect: 5 virtues we should all strive to embody. While these qualities are arguably the most important to cultivate within yourself to be a good friend, there are many more aspects to maintaining healthy and uplifting friendships!
There is no exact definition for a good friend. Each person requires something different out of those they feel closest to: it is our job to find it within ourselves to be the person our friend needs.
And if you feel like the people around you do not fully understand you, don’t fret. Serendip is here to help you connect with new friends who share your core values and beliefs.
