In Romantic Relationships, You’re Either a Spark-Chaser or a Long Burner.
Sara Lynn Michener

The overall premise here is that relationships are accurately viewed from a “high school” perspective (generally). I am writing a response because I disagree with this premise and the path that it can lead people down. The basis of the article is that humping a bunch of different people is the path to joy, fulfillment and potentially finding that right person to spend the foreseeable future with.

The way we view relationships and certain sex in high school is at best, ignorant. It is selfish in nature for men and likely manipulative for women. It is not fulfilling and does not help move you into some place of high enlightenment which would enable you to make better decisions about future relationships.

Sleeping around is painful to everyone short term and long term. It is always either selfish or manipulative.

The truth is that maturity has to enter the picture within a relationship and that is best accomplished along the path of abstinence before marriage. Sex is a distraction that becomes the beacon if it is experienced ahead of what one hopes to be a life commitment.

Only through a committed relationship can you move beyond the spark the author talks of and into a joy-filled relationship that is not dependant upon great sex. That is not to say that great sex will not happen in that environment. What it means is that most people are experiencing the spark instead of something so much better that takes them beyond their wildest dreams.

Sadly this is a very long discussion which I am going to cut short here but with a bit of research one can find that the path to joy in a relationship is much different then that which is demonstrated in this article.

This is not to say that life doesn’t happen. I realize that trauma is sadly a part of our life experience as is our poor choices as times. My hope is not to condemn what you have done or what you have thought but you encourage you to try a different path. We get a renewing each day where we have the opportunity to carve off from the pack and adventure down a new path. I hope you do if you were or are on one that is described in this article. There is more — so much more. But, it is not an easy path. It is hard work and hard work comes with great rewards.

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