Where Things Stand: 2022 NFL Edition Part 3
It’s the Holiday Season at WTS HQ, and we’re all feeling a little festive. With the extra hands on deck, we really have the party vibe atmosphere going on. It’s a little more chill compared to usual.
But I digress, as you’re here for WTS: 2022 NFL Edition Part 3, though you’ll need to catch up on Part 1 and Part 2 if you missed it previously.
We’ve been in a weird space as several narratives have largely stuck true and only a few others have flipped on a dime (or in the Jets case, a coin).
Everything had been running smoothly, and there wasn’t a worry in the world. Intern Diann has been performing solidly in her only season with us, as she’ll be moving on following the conclusion of this year’s Part 4 Finale.
But little did we know that our other new intern was sneaking around and touching things he shouldn’t.
Our security camera footage had been altered when Intern Randy checked it recently, the same camera focusing on the crystal ball. We knew that someone had recently accessed it after we learned the batteries needed to be replaced upon inspection.
With Brandon out of the office that day, I gathered Paul and Intern Mindy as well to figure out what happened.
Jason wasn’t the culprit; we ruled him out immediately. Diann was out of the office around that time, so that left one person on our list: Intern Zack.
He came clean for the most part, wanting to see if it actually worked (it does). When asked what he saw, Zack wouldn’t divulge. He was the only person who knew and kept it all to himself.
We considered sending him back in the time machine to the 1980s like we had with Intern Jason a few years ago to earn some money, but upon a safety inspection, the time machine was missing a part (long story, but nothing nefarious). Associate Paul is in the midst of getting the new part and installing it. No one but those at WTS HQ have access to it, so we feel safe keeping it away from those other parties who want it.
That’s enough office drama. Time to get this rolling in a surprisingly competitive AFC East.
*Note: All team page hyperlinks are to ESPN.
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AFC East
Buffalo: 3–1 | Part 2: 6–2 | Part 3: 9–3
Miami: 3–1 | Part 2: 6–3 | Part 3: 8–4
NY Jets: 2–2 | Part 2: 6–3 | Part 3: 7–5
Patriots: 1–3 | Part 2: 5–4 | Part 3: 6–6
State of the AFC East
Buffalo: The Buffalo area had a snow-maggedon heading into Week 11, and what did the NFL do?
Surprisingly moved their game against Cleveland to Detroit. I say surprisingly because it normally would be the NFL thing to do to NOT move the game. Roger Goodell actually has a heart.
With the game site moved, and the Bills back in the Motor City for Thanksgiving, they became the first team to win back-to-back games at Ford Field since 2016. That Thanksgiving ending was something else!
Yes, the visitors who rarely play in Detroit. It may sound shocking, but it’s not. What is shocking is Miami battling you for the top spot in the division. It’s going to be an interesting race to the finish. As long as New England is kept out of first place, we’re all good.
I’d be remiss if I didn’t mention your Week 10 thriller against Minnesota. Intern Diann, I need the Stefon Diggs grab video in File 1.
Miami: Brett Kollman had a good breakdown on Tua and the ‘Fins. Pretty enlightening. I hope this isn’t him emulating the 2020 season Baker Mayfield had before getting cut.
In all seriousness, the deal for Tyreek Hill was brilliant in setting up Tua with a dynamic receiving combo (Jaylen Waddle’s one reception for nine yards versus the 49ers notwithstanding), and he looks like a god.
I also want all of the Tua haters to finally screw off if this success continues. Intern Zack, I need the opening pass for a 75-yard touchdown throw! Time to show everyone what Miami has and kill a mainstream narrative even further.
Here’s to hoping they can run the rock effectively, and that San Francisco was a fluke.
New York: Mike FREAKING White.
He’s back, folks. Zach Wilson’s terrible Week 11 performance and then unwillingness to take responsibility led him straight to Robert Saleh’s dog house, which was ironically on the bench.
And whaddya know? The highlight of the Jets 2021 campaign in terms of meme status was resurrected again against Chicago and made himself look like the second coming of Joe Montana, especially with his first touchdown pass to Garrett Wilson, and then Wilson again killing defenders’ careers on the second score.
While I’m happy for a guy like White (He’s the closest thing right now to Big D*ck Nick and Minshew Mania, let me have this!), it’s an absolute fall from grace for the former №2 overall pick now holding the clipboard. I’ve been more than generous not shredding him to bits (for various reasons), but if you permanently lose your job to White, then New York has some serious soul searching to do.
Now as I alluded to above, we have a coin in play again, and the Jets even tweeted about it, though I can’t find the tweet for the life of me. I’ve tasked Brandon, Randy and Mindy with finding it while I continue to ramble.
New England: “I am so glad I got to mulligan you guys last year! I needed that out of my system. There’s not much mulligan worthy this year in New England, though I say this knowing some way, somehow, Belichick will find a way to spite me.”
What did I say?! The Hoodie must be an avid reader of this series because… the Patriots are close to dead? Maybe?
I was gonna ask Bill Belichick for his voodoo magic but apparently it’s now waning.
The other secret project worked. I’m pleasantly surprised at the results! We don’t have any other test subjects, so we can’t reveal more than that.
We are so much closer to finally delivering the final wrecking ball to the New England Invitational Division sign hanging over AFC East land.
I never thought I’d see the day.
AFC North
Baltimore: 2–2 | Part 2: 6–3 | Part 3: 8–4
Cincinnati: 2–2 | Part 2: 5–4 | Part 3: 8–4
Cleveland: 2–2 | Part 2: 3–5 | Part 3: 5–7
Pittsburgh: 1–3 | Part 2: 2–6 | Part 3: 5–7
State of the AFC North:
Baltimore: Lamar Jackson out one-to-three weeks. Why does the headline sound like DeJa Vu?
Oh yeah, it’s happened before, and it didn’t end pretty for the Ravens a year ago.
Lamar betting on himself is one thing, but these injuries now put the potential “injury prone” label in play. It also hasn’t helped his case for the fully guaranteed mega-deal that Jackson’s performance has been subpar at best in the passing game.
This is why I’ve been the guy to put Lamar in the second tier for quarterbacks. He needs to learn how to make better throws when his ability to run is jeopardized. I’m saying all of this because we know how special he can be (and a pain in the rear end for defenses).
I’m hard on him, and I’ll be the first to admit that. You have to be able to succeed when your running chops and athleticism take a dive. Otherwise, you’re cooked by age 30.
Cincinnati: “The Bengals managed to rebound until the unthinkable happened: Ja’Marr Chase being sidelined for at least four-to-six weeks with a hip injury.
He is literally your offensive axis, and how Joe Burrow manages to play without his favorite toy will be a defining narrative of his career.
Is this reaction a little over the top? Not really. This offense lacked punch before Chase arrived. Tee Higgins and Tyler Boyd now need to have the best stretches of football in their lives to prevent an epic collapse.”
Not only did the Bengals manage to survive without Ja’Marr Chase (huge third down conversion, by the way) for a few weeks, but they now are in position to repeat as division champs.
Samaje Perine playing above his head also helps cover up for Joe Mixon’s health issues of late.
To think we all were ready to bury the Bengals after their 0–2 start. How silly we all were.
It’s still more impressive the offensive line play improved enough to limit Joe Burrow to only five sacks in the past few weeks.
Cleveland: So you’re telling me you got obliterated coming out of the bye week and then managed to beat Tom Brady… in overtime… after trailing in the fourth quarter?!
Did I drink too much Kool-Aid or something? Intern Diann, gather all relevant clips and show me how this happened.
I do not care about the Houston game. That is irrelevant.
Okay, the DPJ return is relevant. That one, too.
Now where was I… Tampa Bay footage!
Holy heck, Njoku with a one-hander? And Amari Cooper totally redeeming himself?! Could it be…
*Looks at cup of Kool-Aid on the corner of the desk for a brief moment before chucking it into the trash bin*
Yeah, no. No celebrations this year. This is all business now, remember? The Haslam’s went out and got their quarterback. Now show us the results, and let’s see where this goes.
I still can’t believe you beat Brady and have a modest two game win streak. I was ready to lay down the hammer, but I have a VERY distinct feeling that the hammer will be coming in a few weeks.
Also, thank you, Jacoby! You performed admirably and were a stand-up starter.
Pittsburgh: Why do you keep winning?
Just, why? LOSE DAMMIT!! You’re significantly overdue for a losing season (or 10), and the world needs it. World Peace could be had.
Oh wait, no. That’s when Brady retires.
I’m still in shock that Chase Claypool got them a second round draft choice at the deadline. Watch the Steelers draft a Hall of Fame caliber player with that pick.
However, I’d be a liar if I didn’t admit seeing the Steelers in the basement didn’t feel good. It’s time to start… I’m not gonna say it! We can’t jinx things any more than we have.
AFC South
Tennessee: 2–2 | Part 2: 5–3 | Part 3: 7–5
Indianapolis: 1–2–1 | Part 2: 3–5–1 | Part 3: 4–8–1
Jacksonville: 2–2 | Part 2: 3–6 | Part 3: 4–8
Houston: 0–3–1 | Part 2: 1–6–1 | Part 3: 1–10–1
State of the AFC South:
Tennessee: You fired General Manager Brian Robinson?
When you’re about to lock up your division?!
I get that ~certain circumstances~ made him the fall guy after Week 13, but I want to know if OWNERSHIP didn’t want to pay their former stud talent and not just the GM.
I think the Titans could also be close to locking up another prestigious prize.
Indianapolis: The Jeff Saturday experiment was fun for a week but now you see why it wasn’t going to work out long-term for the Dolts.
It’s fun but just not winnable. Jonathan Taylor, Shaq Leonard and those guys are all going to be a year older with yet another wasted season. You have to win out (assuming no further ties) to secure a .500 season.
Oh yeah. Andrew Luck had a recent interview drop and did that ever cut deep. Glad for the man but woof!! I’m glad I never pursued the journey of an NFL quarterback. That all sounds brutal.
Jacksonville: Does Trevor Lawrence break out fully next year after his comeback against Baltimore (Paul, I need the footage!)?
I’ll say his fourth year when they truly fortify the offensive line is when Trevor takes off.
There’s been fun moments and painful ones.
Let’s focus on the fun with their rally against Baltimore. I need someone to feed some clips to Zack!
Barring some idiotic decision, you are likely spared from being the Mulligan Team.
Houston: They suck. Collect your №1 pick for a quarterback. Prepare for a roasting in the finale!
AFC West
Kansas City: 3–1 | Part 2: 6–2 | Part 3: 9–3
LA Chargers: 2–2 | Part 2: 5–3 | Part 3: 6–6
Las Vegas: 1–3 | Part 2: 2–6 | Part 3: 5–7
Denver: 2–2 | Part 2: 3–5 | Part 3: 3–9
State of the AFC West:
Kansas City: Just as Cleveland and New Orleans are Cincinnati and Tampa Bay’s kryptonite respectively, that is what the Bengals are to Kansas City.
For no good reason, the Chiefs have lost thrice to the AFC champs in 11 months, and it is bizarre. Maybe Ja’Marr Chase has something to do with it?
Or perhaps…
I don’t know what I was going for. Let’s just keep it at ‘things that don’t make sense.’
Brandon, what highlight have the Chiefs offense given us since last time? They always do something fun.
I guess nothing right now. We’re hoping for the Part 4 punt return TD to be a thing again.
LA Chargers: I hate to say it, but Brandon Staley is out of a job barring a Super Bowl run.
He’s aggressive, makes games a unique challenge and is wasting a year of Justin Herbert on his rookie deal.
The results aren’t there. They need to escape the Rams’ shadow. They know what must be done to succeed in LA.
Bring in Sean Payton. That’ll fix ~everything~.
Las Vegas: “Davante Adams has been solid, but the team has fallen apart. Perhaps in hindsight, retaining Rich Bisaccia would have yielded better results. I’m currently not going to go shred-mode on Vegas, but they do make it awfully tempting.
I’ll find a reason in one of the next two editions.”
Is Josh McDaniels learning or are we seeing the byproduct of a very soft schedule?
I will reserve judgment for Part 4. This is a bizarre situation.
Denver: Fire the Hack already!!
Knowing my luck, it didn’t work. One of these days it will.
But man, Russell Wilson getting yelled at by the defense and just being flat out terrible?!
Seattle was right. Russ really did fall off a cliff. That, or Hackett is just so utterly incompetent. Maybe both.
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The “NFC East being a good division” crisis has not been solved, but there is enough evidence for us to have one punching bag.
That will not be Editor Brandon Lewis’ Eagles, though other NFC divisions may not be spared.
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NFC East
Philly: 4–0 | Part 2: 8–0 | Part 3: 11–1
Dallas: 3–1 | Part 2: 6–2 | Part 3: 9–3
NY Giants: 3–1 | Part 2: 6–2 | Part 3: 7–4–1
Washington: 1–3 | Part 2: 4–5 | Part 3: 7–5–1
State of the NFC East:
Philadelphia: The 1972 Dolphins can pop their champagne once more. They finally lost to… Washington?
Add another item to the list that was not on my 2022 bingo card, though it’s miraculous how outstanding these Eagles have played. Jalen Hurts may be having the best season he may ever have in his career, at least statistically.
Then there’s Dallas Goedert (when healthy) Devonta Smith, and of course, the guy Tennessee didn’t want to pay, A.J. Brown.
I bet the Titans feel really stupid, don’t they? He just casually dropped 119 yards and two touchdowns in the revenge match on them. ~Totally not №1 wideout production week in and out~.
Get me the video Brandon!
Philadelphia: The Super Bowl! Part 2’ anybody? I know Brandon is already on board. I’m just taking the temperature of the rest of the room.
That’s a yes from the Interns and Paul.
Oh, wait. Intern Zack said Minnesota. I mean, I can’t blame him, can I?!
*Light bulb goes off*
Wait a minute! CHECK HIS INTERNET HISTORY!! QUICKLY!!
Dallas: It’s been a few years since Dallas won on Thanksgiving, but they did it!
Barring an epic collapse, Dak Prescott should drag Mike ‘Less of a Hack than Hackett’ McCarthy to a 13–4 record and a Wild Card win over Tom Brady.
But more importantly, the Dallas defense and special teams delivered me a Sunday night miracle victory in Week 13 for one of my fantasy football leagues.
In an unironic and actually proud moment here…
HOW ‘BOUT THEM COWBOYS!
And Zeke hopped into the kettle again? Oh, good times! Brandon, get me 2022 and rookie year Zeke doing it!
NY Giants: I have an NFC East punching bag! Washington’s done more than you of late, but I SAID ENOUGH WITH THE GODDAMN TIES IN PART 1!!
My fraud meter is going off, and I don’t think you wanna know what happens if it proves to be true.
It’s been a nice season but look at the standings progression up above! What looks off to you?
A big drop off from Week 9 to now. Going 1–2–1 is not the way you’ll avoid an absolute shredding (despite Brian Daboll currently being competent).
You really, really don’t want to know what happens if you’re exposed as frauds. Make the playoffs or else!
I’ll give you a hint: Atlanta.
Washington: Why are you winning six of eight with a tie? How did you do it?
I’m guessing Dan Snyder actually being somewhat open to selling the team caused an abundance of good juju to develop.
*LE GASP*
What will happen if the Commanders make the playoffs, and Snyder reevaluates selling?
SOMEONE GET THEM TO LOSE!! They’re a good story, but we NEED that dumb-dumb gone. Paul and Mindy, break out the other secret project! DEFCON 1!!
NFC North
Minnesota: 3–1 | Part 2: 7–1 | Part 3: 10–2
Detroit: 1–3 | Part 2: 2–6 | Part 3: 5–7
Green Bay: 3–1 | Part 2: 3–6 | Part 3: 5–8
Chicago: 2–2 | Part 2: 3–6 | Part 3: 3–10
State of the NFC North:
Minnesota: Kirk Cousins wins in prime time? Never would have thought of that.
Intern Mindy found the following tweet I sent to Brandon:
It also helps when you have Justin Jefferson being a god, and we’re just witnessing him. Then it’s easy. How big is that contract going to be?
More importantly, intern Mindy! I need the catch versus Buffalo placed in File 5!
Please don’t be frauds. I like you guys, but I also need to know good friend Quentin Griffin’s reaction to a Vikes Super Bowl.
You can’t blame Mike Zimmer anymore. Good luck, fellas!
Detroit: Welcome back Sun God! You have vaulted back to the forefront just in time for fantasy football playoffs and for my arch-rival to have you and every wideout he started go bonkers onThanksgiving (including Jefferson).
I want to know what’s in the secret sauce here. Is it pinches of knee cap dust or are the Lions running a good offensive scheme for Jared Goff to operate as a game manager?
I’ve been wondering more and more of late about the former top pick from 2016 out of Cal. Is this sustainable? Could Jameson Williams even elevate this team next season to contender status if they shore up the defense and offensive line.
I’m curious to find out.
Green Bay: The end of A-A-Ron.
Horrible joke but it needed to be done. Rodgers somewhat has it, but the injuries have added up, and I wonder if he would like to retire after the whole saga that happened in 2021.
I mean, I think it’ll be a no, but he’s probably the most interesting man in the world and would make bank off of a Dos Equis commercial.
There’s one bright spot since we last spoke: Christian Watson going God mode.
Diann and Zack, get me Clips from Weeks 10–13. Time to break a couple of top choices down!
He’s been an absolute monster. I regret dropping him in fantasy now, but Rodgers clearly trusts the guy, so that helps.
Speaking of Aaron, I think you need to draft a first round wideout and then fortify the offensive line and the front seven in April’s draft. Otherwise, welcome to permanent mediocrity because Jordan Love has been shelved for the most part, and that option year won’t be cheap.
Chicago: Again, Justin Fields is a cheat code, and I say that with more emphasis as I yell at the screen while I type this, so you all don’t have to see it in all caps.
Oh, what a time. Paul, I need a couple of his long TD runs! Let’s put them into File 6 and File 26.
You know what must be done, Chicago. Upgrade the talent and make that an impenetrable offensive line. The defense will be third after the weaponry is upgraded.
NFC South
Tampa Bay: 2–2 | Part 2: 4–5 | Part 3: 6–6
Atlanta: 2–2 | Part 2: 4–5 | Part 3: 5–8
Carolina: 1–3 | Part 2: 2–7 | Part 3: 4–8
New Orleans: 1–3 | Part 2: 3–6 | Part 3: 4–9
State of the NFC South:
Tampa Bay: What everyone wants to say is the offensive line is battered, and Brady can’t do anything behind it.
I counter that while Todd Bowles is a good coach, he isn’t the right coach for this team.
Don’t get it twisted, Bowles is someone I’ve always had some respect for. It was refreshing when Bruce Arians stepped away that he got another shot to be the head man on the sidelines. The dude isn’t terrible.
Sadly, I think Arians would have the Bucs at 8–4 right now with wins against Cleveland and the Steelers.
Barring another surprise in this somewhat acid trip of a season, I don’t foresee another ‘Tompa Bay’ Super Bowl parade.
I dare Brady to prove this lone writer and his editor wrong (in jest, of course. I don’t want to be on the GOAT’s s***list).
One more thing: We need the Week 13 Brady clutch comeback №44. Revel in the mystique of the GOAT!
Atlanta: This is an executive decision being made early no matter what happens the rest of the way: The Fall Down Cons stay through at least next year. This abomination of a division like the 2020 NFC East was doesn’t justify removal of the moniker.
It may or may not be for other reasons, like needing a punching bag given the Jets have actually been solid.
Carolina: Sam Darnold won a game.
So both the №1 and №3 picks in the 2018 draft have wins under their belts for Carolina. Probably a first in NFL history to happen in the same season.
Look, real talk, there’s still a massive rebuild in progress. The CMC haul certainly helps, but you have to nail the picks in order to return to relevance.
But first, it’s time to pour out a Bud Light from the victory fridge for Baker Mayfield. I will forever cherish that 2020 season, and the hope he delivered me for the first time in my life as a Cleveland Browns fan.
And at least for a short time, the hope was legitimate.
New Orleans: I wouldn’t have said this a few years ago, but I am now.
We’re not wasting time on you… right now. Let’s do a deep dive in Part 4.
NFC West
San Fran: 2–2 | Part 2: 4–4 | Part 3: 8–4
Seattle: 2–2 | Part 2: 6–3 | Part 3: 7–5
Arizona: 2–2 | Part 2: 3–6 | Part 3: 4–8
LA Rams: 2–2 | Part 2: 3–5 | Part 3: 3–9
State of the NFC West:
San Francisco: I don’t know if the crystal ball could have seen this M. Night Shyamalan plot twist coming.
Jimmy G is not out for the year with a broken foot? Maybe?
Just as the 49ers snagged first place.
San Francisco, I present to you your new lord and savior! Brock… Purdy? Mr. Irrelevant?
Oy vey. I hope Kyle Shanahan has a plan for his talent to carry his injury riddled quarterback room to the Super Bowl.
Seattle: Now this was more of what I was expecting from the Seahawks! Struggling to keep up in a battered division.
Yet because Jimmy G happened to hurt his porcelain foot, Seattle actually has a chance to win this division (with or without Kenneth Walker III).
Why are we giving the 12’s false hope? It’s honestly cruel and undeserved punishment when they should have been collecting a high draft pick.
Arizona: Being a career back-up quarterback must be nice for a guy like Colt McCoy.
Sit on your backside, hold the clipboard and get a few snaps every now and then in blowouts.
That’s if Kyler Murray didn’t get hammered to all hell and forced you into the brain battering machine known as the starting lineup.
I keep pounding the table for Kliff Kingsbury to get the proverbial ax. It’s funny after I was a somewhat staunch defender of the guy following the end of last season, but ugly warts have been exposed.
You are not the hot stuff, Kliff. There is tension in that building that we can all sense from a hundred miles away. Take your money and run back to college. That is, if you can find a gig as an offensive coordinator.
LA Rams: Brandon, remove the censorship on this one.
Holy sh*t.
DANG IT! Everyone can boo Brandon LOL!
I thought Los Angeles would be middle of the road the rest of the year, but how did this title defense get to be such an abomination?
Stafford looks cooked as mentioned last time.
Cooper Kupp is hurt.
Where is Aaron Donald? Oh yeah, he’s out with a high ankle sprain, the first big injury of his career.
And your running back room is the most confusing conundrum I’ve possibly ever seen.
This isn’t a shredding, don’t get me wrong here. I’m flabbergasted and befuddled at the ‘F them picks’ strategy finally failing.
So what have we learned?
San Francisco now has a three year window before they become the Rams.
I was tempted to bring back the Super Frauds moniker for old times sake, but the Lombardi is still nicely polished.
We’ll give it another year before anything drastic happens. Just don’t do anything stupid, okay?
I also have the weird feeling Sean McVay may take his early retirement very shortly.
Wait, did someone say Baker Mayfield?!
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I cannot wait for Part 4! We’ll have the Mulligan Team, several teams to shred, and coaches and executives getting fired.
However, I do apologize for getting this out not on a Thursday, per usual. Health and other factors came into play, and we couldn’t rush this out half-baked.
We are tentatively planning to launch the Part 4 finale the Friday after Week 18. More firings means more shreddings.
We’ll keep the fire warm in the meantime, and we’ll see you in a few weeks! I’ve got some columns to draft up in the meantime.
Sean Fitzgerald is an award-winning journalist, writer, sports reporter, voice over talent and co-host of The Weekenders Podcast with Mitch Spinell. Follow him on Twitter @fitzonsportsbsr for insights, articles and occasional livestreams, as well as bi-weekly columns here on medium.com.
