There’s More to Life Than Faking Appearances — 004

Hiding in your own shell is the best way to never experience growth.

Hiding in someone else’s light.

We’ve all been someone else to get something we wanted. The classic example is a kid that wants their parents to buy them something so they act nice for as long as possible in order to get it. This behaviour doesn’t really stop at six years old, people in general do a lot of acting to get what they want; it’s very effective. The problem starts when people become too attached to that feeling. Being able to get what you want based on a disingenuous behaviour becomes a sort of addiction. When people lie and get away with it, the body and mind’s natural reaction is to subconsciously smile. It’s the pleasure of “I’m getting away with it!”

My conjecture is that people also feel the same way when they try to use auxiliary items, like that new necklace or SLP bag, to make themselves feel better about themselves by attempting to trick others and thereby tricking themselves. People with deficiencies will often try to make up for that with a plethora of material goods. I used to believe that if I just had more stuff, everything would be okay. It was almost as if everything I bought was a temporary painkiller for what was happening in real life. Better than Tylenol, but I digress. So many people still continue to try to fix some deficiency with material goods and it’s just not that effective. Then again, that’s how marketing works, they sell an idea or projection of who you could be with a particular product. We’re pushing towards this concept of buying your identity. Especially with the internet and globalization, many many Asian youths adore Western culture and vice versa and we sell and buy clothing that at a glance tells others a lot about our personalities. We indulge in these trivial identity modifiers and invest in an extremely short lived band aid solution.

We’re pushing towards this concept of buying your identity.

When you fake appearances constantly, it’s so difficult to establish a real identity and eventually you get to a point where you don’t know who you are, your family is alienated and the friends that you made through your fake appearance have left. It ends up being fruitless and your return on investment is way negative. You also lose the opportunity for growth of self; if you’re constantly running five different personalities, you only learn 20% of what you could be investing into one. People like consistency; your thoughts and your actions should line up to a reasonable level. Being disingenuous is easily spotted and will invite dislike more often than not. Finding the correct balance between who you actually are and appropriating for the situation is what is important to remember. If you’re genuine and have confidence in who you are, there’ll be a line of people wanting to acquaint themselves with you. There’s so much more to life than faking appearances. Find your identity and concentrate on yourself first and foremost. Family is secondary, friends are tertiary and networking is complimentary. Focus up.

There’s More to Life (TMTL) is a project surrounding our perception of life and how at times we can be short sighted in seeing what it has to offer. TMTL will be a daily post based on suggestions from comments and personal conversations. Every day is accompanied by a picture I shoot and you can see those in full, here. Today’s TMTL was suggested by Karim Eltanahy, someone I’ve known for at least six years. TMTL — 005 tomorrow, right here, oh man.