Look Ma… 

5 Life Lessons I learnt from my Son

The Y2K kid, a thoroughbred millennial, my favourite teacher — that’s my son. As he was learning the ropes of life, he taught me some valuable lessons. The greatest lessons you learn from your child is when he is discovering the world in the first decade of his life. Here are my favourite 5:

#1 Pursue and persist — The crocodile tears, the mind-numbing “why nots” and the clever mantra of “if-at-first-mum-says-no-try-her-dad” were powerful tools.

Go after that girl or sales opportunity as a child pursues that video game or candy. I have heard women blame their husband or children for not pursuing their dream. I often respond with, “That was then, what’s stopping you from chasing your dream today?”

#2 Live in the moment — On a typical working day, he clung to me refusing to let me go. I had a hard time tearing myself away. After 2 minutes when I returned home to fetch my phone, I found him happily engrossed in the inane TV show “Bananas in Pajamas”. He wouldn’t plan for next year or the year after, for floods or cyclones. All it took was my chanting of ‘S-M-I-L-E’ for him to break into a smile.

We get bogged down by tasks that have no immediate value. Take one day or one step at a time. When attending a meeting, don’t worry about the email from your client. When having dinner with your friend, don’t take a sneak peek at your mobile phone (I know I have this disease!). The task at hand is always more important than a million things that you need to do later.

#3 Don’t over-analyse life — At 5 years, when he boarded the flight from Kuala Lumpur to Mumbai as an unaccompanied minor, he never looked back as he walked off with the airport staff much like Richard Parker in Life of Pi.

Life can be simple if you give it a chance. When you want to start a new project, marry or buy a new house, don’t create an excel sheet. When someone comes to you for help — do what you can. Don’t sit and analyse “what’s in it for me?” Don’t become a victim of analysis paralysis.

#4 Rely on self-discovery — Quite early he discovered that life can be pretty hard after he tried his crayons on freshly painted walls. Later he found his love for history as he dug into stories of Roman soldiers, Greek Gods and Viking warriors on the Internet on his own. The result was the book that he published at 11 years of age.

Find your own path to get to your goal. Don’t do as your boss, parent or husband tells you. They are mostly wrong.

#5 Tune out negativity — In his early years, he was obsessed with Hanuman (his favourite character from the Indian epic Ramayan). When he was bored he would strut around with a pink coloured mace, pretending to be Hanuman in his epic search for princess Sita. He knew how to tune out when he was dragged to a boring party.

I often see people obsessing over what is wrong with the world (read the million Facebook posts about scams in India) and not as much on what works. Learn to tune out nay-sayers who hold you back in your pursuit of the unknown.

Sadly as adults we unlearn our “childlike” qualities and learn to become childish — sulking when not getting that promotion, throwing an email tantrum when someone screws up in a project, or being Me-centric when travelling.

So next time you are in doubt, look at a child near you and you will find your answers. As for me, it’s a constant endeavour to embrace those childlike qualities. When I feel lost, I have to remind myself — “Look Ma..life is simple, don’t complicate it!”