Racing thoughts

Madmansworld
Aug 31, 2018 · 2 min read

A leech that sucks the life out of you until it leaves an empty hole in your heart. A parasite that runs deep in your mind until it eats your sanity. The moment it eats you whole is the day that you’ll disappear from the face of the Earth. What will you do if that parasite entered your mind?

It’s been in me for long, years or so, eating away my vigorous energy from day to day. It grows in the depths of my heart trying to reach for my soul as if it’s been preying on it. At first, it was just that size of a bacteria until it turned into a big monster, looming over, about to eat me.

I’ve watched myself in dreams being killed as if it’s the norm already. Wishing that I will not wake up in the morning. My surroundings are black, the strings are all black. The strings are all tangled that my heart created as if to choke me and the people I love.

Yes, it’s been so long, so long since I’ve shut myself away from the society. The anxiety attacks come and go and I try not to let it show. Ah, that rhymes if I may say so. Pitiful me, crying endlessly every night begging to disappear, my reflection in the mirror mocking, laughing, screaming at me as if telling me to die. Sighing, I’ve forgotten who I am. What’s my name again?

I see another person in front of the mirror, it’s the leech that had been with me for years, stealing my form. Grinning at me, about to choke and replace me. Ah, pitiful me, trying to hold the edge of the cliff. Holding onto that thin thread of sanity, hope, and happiness.

Again, what will you do if the parasite entered your mind? Simple, do not feed it.

I’m sorry…