EXT. LONDON CITY — NIGHT
The year is 1794, KENNETH a young educated miner from cornwall, finds himself seeking accommodation and a woman for the night. He is wearing his finest liveries and through the fog of rain we see KENNETH being led by a small man to the front of a pub.
’Tis a small vaulting school, is it not?
The small man, smiles and nods and leaves KENNETH standing out the front of the pub. KENNETH fixes his lapels and enters.
INT- BAR — NIGHT
KENNETH finds himself in a dusty rowdy bar, filled with whores and lawyers. KENNETH, a little tipsy already, seeks the brothel keeper and makes his way to the bar.
Good day to you, the abbess in?
No Abbess here mate…
No? Is this not a house of civil reception?
To whom may it concern?
Only too I, good sir.
My assurances; I am no hanktelo, though my hair is a coat of soot and my arrival in town follows a turn in cornwall. I am not to hang an arse, I require a good academician and a bed. I ask only for an apple-dumpling shop to keep me warm through the blashy, sir.
You seem an honest duke of limbs.
(beat) Magdela is upstairs. Tell her blythe sent ya’.
Good evening to you, sir.
KENNETH makes his way up the staircase in the back of the bar. At the top he finds a hallway, with scented candles leading towards a small red curtain.
Madam, I am here for your finest draggle-tail. No time to waste I am indeed gallied.
Be this a fegary, sir? We have only the finest game pullet in this establishment and no tolerance for a brandy-face.
I joke not madam. I am not flawed, but I am gallied. Services are required, if you please.
Blythe told me you could be of help, if this is incorrect, I shall take my leave.
Well, sir. It seems you are indeed a herring-gutted young hemp.
How dare yo…
If you were to not leave of your own accord, there may be some gentlemen off the hooks willing to take the owl with a paper-skull such as yourself.
… a Paper-skull!? It seems you have saddled the wrong horse.
KENNETH turns on his heels and exits the chamber of MAGDELA in a huff.
18th Century Slang Index:
A house of civil reception — a brothel
Abbess — a woman who is a brothel keeper
Academician — a whore
Apple-dumpling shop — a woman’s bosom
Hang an arse — to hold back
Bailed man — a man who has bribed the press gang for immunity
Blashy — rainy weather
Brandy-face — a drunkard
Bung upwards — on his face
Draggle-tail — a nasty, dirty slut
Duke of limbs — a tall awkward fellow
Fegary — a prank
Flawed — drunk
Game pullet — a young whore
Gallied — hurried, vexed or over-fatigued
Hanktelo — a fool
Herring-gutted — tall and very thin
Young hemp — a graceless boy
Off the hooks — crazy
Paper-skull — a fool
Take the owl — become angry
Sawney — a Scotsman
Saddle the wrong horse — lay blame on the wrong person
Vaulting school — a brothel
I found this an interesting exercise. I created the added challenge of trying to write in period.