When Did Being “Too Nice” Become a Character Flaw?
Jeff Barton

I am back in the dating game after like 27 years and I can’t believe how hard it is to find a “nice” guy. I’ve tried online dating and so far have found a guy who told me his wife was dead from breast cancer who turned out to be alive and had just undergone a double mastectomy; a guy who portrayed himself as a star but a little searching found he was an abuser and a deadbeat dad; and then there was the guy who was broke, on all kinds of prescription drugs and said he was so good looking the “throbbing” would start even before I caught my first glimpse of him. I closed down my online dating account. I don’t want messed up. I don’t want boring, sit on my couch all the time either. I think dating as an adult is more difficult because you don’t have hours of time for leisure activities. In high school and college, there were tons of activities where you could get together with large groups of people and just hang, at least a few times a week. You had time to chat with people and see how they acted in their group of friends. As an adult, how do you do that? Bars are not the answer. Church, particularly my church, is full of married couples. Work is not a cool place to find a partner. What does that leave? My family and friends are always telling me to “get involved in something.” When? If I’m not working, I’m taking care of my home which I take care of by myself or enjoying my pets or my three kids and family and friends. Exactly what am I supposed to do? So, yes, I would like and appreciate a nice guy. I just don’t run into many single ones.