Indian housewives are the Sun around which revolves the domestic planetary system.
She is the ringmaster who needs to keep the household circus running. Just as we face occasional crises in life, so do these forever hardworking women.
Just as a ringmaster faces occasional growls from the lion so do these housewives and they happen in greater frequency than once in a blue moon. There are several crisis faced by an Indian housewife and they are growing in numbers each day.
Here are a few humorous takes on the mundane yet tedious life of an Indian housewife.
A housewife never finds enough helping hand. There is always acute shortage of staffing in the Indian kitchen. You might enviously say that an Indian housewife has several servants and maids at her disposal unlike you or your wife who has to run the show in an unknown city abroad but read carefully.
This one woman has to serve and feed a family of ten or maybe more. The beneficiaries range in age and demands thus making her stretch her muscles and skills every time her mother-in-law asks for a cup of tea without sugar while the rest of the family members want it sweetened. Even Shanti bai waves her a good bye when the clock strikes six in the evening despite the huge pile up of dishes in the washbasin.
So how do you get breakfast in squeaky clean plates the next morning? You didn’t wash them, neither did your daughter or your dog, so who cleaned the mammoth pile after the family dinner?
This is one of the major crises faced by Indian women. They are UNPAID. You may say you repay her with your love and affection and loyalty (if you are a man). Otherwise she is the best free maid you get who will support you, clean your house, take care of you and do it so responsibly.
When it comes to comparing culinary skills between men and women, men argue that top chefs in the world are men and not from the fairer sex. I would like to retaliate with the fact that men are paid for spending hours in the kitchen but when a woman does it at home “out of her love for the family members” you feel “money cannot buy it”.
Statistics show than a woman can earn up to Rs.10000 for all the domestic chores that she does. This is the pay for a household helper you hire for 8hrs a day for six or seven days a week whereas housewives work 24hrs a day for seven days a week until her body fails her.
In an Indian household there is only one person who is considered the pillar of all blaming, the housewife. Whenever a pair of socks goes untraceable or darling Bunty comes home crying from the playground or when the neighbour’s dog barks too much; the housewife is blamed because she must have forgotten to stack the socks in the shelf after tumble drying them, she must have chosen the right set of friends for Bunty to play with and she must have told the neighbour to tie up her dog.
One day when Bunty grows up, he accuses her yet again for not being wise enough to have chosen the right bride for him because she too misplaced the socks!
An unmistakable fact of Indian marriages is the husband’s loss of interests in his wife after 5 yrs of marriage. She is attention deprived though not wholly deprived because he does remember her when he can’t find his shirt, wallet or when he comes home hungry at mid night from an office dinner.
You might blame the housewife for her lack of effort in retaining her husband’s affection but could you have done it when you have to shoulder the household responsibility of 10 members of a family. It leaves you very little time to think of how to please your husband. But if you think of it, what effort does the husband put in to hold her attention?
Whenever I say relatives, the additional- es, denoting plural form of the word does not include just two or three people, it includes scores of people some who may not have shown their face ever since your wedding. It falls upon the housewife’s responsibility to see that they are provided service greater than The Taj. This service includes food-on-demand, entertainment 24*7, direct access to the housewife’s wardrobe in case the sister-in-law’s sister’s cousin falls in love with her new designer saree.
She effortlessly dons her face with an air-hostess smile even when the small boys break Bunty’s favourite toy, the invitees criticise her cooking while gluttonously shoving it down their throat.
Scarcity of time is the biggest issue faced by an Indian housewife there is barely any time for procrastination or leisure. When you become a housewife there are no breaks or vacation, you are hired as a daughter-in-law, as a wife, as a mother for 24*7 for the rest of you life. This means you forget your hobbies, past times and your childhood friends.
Being an Indian Housewife is like receiving your declaration of slavery along with the marriage certificate.
Despite these crisis for reasons totally unknown, Indian housewives still say they love their job and thousands everyday accept this declaration with vermilion on their forehead and a black bead chain around their neck. Maybe there is some magic in the “out of love” phase.
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