Words Served Hot, Side Of Fries
I have to admit something, I allowed a momentary thought to enter my mind — as I was gearing up to sit down and write, I thought, “I don’t have to for today, right?”. Wrong! Part of what I’ve been telling people is that this isn’t just a “thing” I’m doing, I’m trying to carve out a future career out of this humble morning pastime. So, no, you can’t skip today, Shawn, nor any day. Do you hear me?!
That out of the way, it’s interesting where that thought took me once I quickly banished it. Speaking for myself, I’ve made promises to do things, plans for projects down the road, even made commitments to people that I’ve eventually let fall down. Never to be completed and just saved on an external hard drive or in Google Docs. (I mentioned this in an earlier piece I wrote, the one where this whole “promise to write” originated…). Why did I get so excited by something, enough so to commit to producing something or reaching a goal only to get bored and move on? Right now, I don’t have a concise answer, and while I’m using daily introspection to lay out my thoughts and examine them for truth, I don’t have the time (or audience patience) to formulate a dissertation on the what, how, wherefore, and why. (Yes, wherefore and why mean the same thing, but in this case “why” is doubly important!).
I guarantee that everyone’s had this happen. “Oh my God, I totally need to do that!”, “I’m doing new thing x, I can’t wait to look back in a year and review my progress.”, “I do this now, that is so last week”. We’ve all told that to people — or didn’t and said it to ourselves. Is follow-through really that hard? More than likely, if the thing your thinging isn’t quite the thingiest thing you’re trying to thing, follow-through can be a bitch. I was told by a former boss that I’m an excellent ideas guy and I’m great for brainstorming and imagineering, but my follow-through sucks. I always take criticism with a grain of salt because it’s not supposed to be personal, just constructive. (Criticism that’s meant to be personal isn’t criticism, that’s shade). Upon further review, I can say I agree. Ideas? I got a billion. How many have come to profitable fruition? I’ll tell you when I see where this one goes. Does that make me lazy? No, I don’t think so. I’m not lazy, just a little directionless I guess.
I love to cook. Open the cabinets, peek in the fridge; eggs, leftover kale, rice noodles, Parmesan, scallions, you’ve got some cheap homemade ramen with a soft-boiled egg on top. I can get ideas about food — oh my God the food! — and easily follow through to a completed product. Profit? A full belly. So if I can do it when I cook, why not in other aspects of my life — both creative and “daytime” professional? Simply put, I’m still trying to figure that out. A big part of that is not allowing myself to say things like, “You’ve been so good, just take a day off”. You need to eat — “You’ve eaten all week, skip eating today, you deserve it,” said no foodie ever. (Shawn = Foodie). Learning how to take those carnal motivations for food and the creativity I let fly when I’m in front of the stove and translating them into motivations for another avenues is the real lesson I’m trying to learn with writing everyday.
Speaking of cooking… last night I took an idea that I had and put it into action. I baked two chicken breasts, seasoned with garlic, S&P, red chili powder, a little curry powder, cumin, and rosemary. Not the final product, I used one to make chicken salad, heaped with celery, onion, and coarse-grain mustard; and the other was used for a simple but oh-so-tasty, deconstructed Mexican wet street taco type thing. I took a whole onion, whole tomato, garlic, two Serrano chilies, tomato paste, cumin, and S&P and cooked it down to a dark red goop that smelled like hot salsa. Then shredded my leftover chicken breast and folded that in. The end result looked like enchilada stuffing (ideas for later!). We ate that over brown jasmine rice — tryna be healthy — topped with fresh cilantro. No recipe, just an idea and about an hour’s worth of work from first chop to last top. Aasim kept saying how good the damn thing was, which is always great to hear for an amateur chef who takes inspiration from Julia Child and Gordon Ramsey.

Yesterday was no different. I wrote, and kicked the crap out of the rest of the day, and ended it with cooking this meal out of the things in my fridge — probably the thingiest thing I thinged all day! Part of where I feel well-rounded as it relates to cooking comes in the bonding with my husband as we sit on the couch in the living room to dig in and enjoy. I reflexively ask how everything is, because my mother taught me that as a cook you expect an “Mmmm” but are ready at a moment’s notice to fix whatever is missing from their audible satisfaction. We then go through the pleasantries of “So good”, “Good I’m glad” and move into how we talk about our day. While I’d take a bullet for my kitchen, I’d take a North Korean nuke for that bonding time with Aasim over a bowl/plate of dinner. So while I “love to cook” I also love to eat, share a meal with someone, and talk about life — that’s what cooking means to me. Writing, I’m finding, is more than just putting words to paper (or cloud-based document sharing), it’s showing a little more of myself, honing my skill, and talking to people about it. So if you’ve made it this far through this morning’s ramble, thank you! You’re part of the reason why I’m choosing to do this everyday, and part of the reason why I can’t give myself a break. I hope you are able to join me regularly and taste a little of what I have going on. As Julia would say, “Bon apetit!”.
