Week 1 Fantasy 2018

Draft Night Recap
Huge thanks to Tony and Tim for putting on the 2018 Draft party, Tim for planning and Tony for hosting. Honestly I had an amazing time and I don’t a single person there didn’t have a point where they regretted coming (Except maybe Logan after losing his phone to lake in the first 15 minutes but nothing a little boating and alcohol can’t fix). Next season we need to get Bob out here as well as no excuses to Noah.
As to everyone who came, best part of the draft had to be watching Justin, drunker than Hellen Keller dropped in a beer vat, interact with my dad as he tried his best to focus on the draft. Honestly drafting live really brings a whole new element as everyone is cursing at the guy before him that stole his pick, or maybe that was just me.
Once again, Miguel continues to wake up with money in his pockets after poker. Alcohol will need to be banned from Miguel as this is the most powerful performance enhancing drug I have ever seen. The longer the night goes the more dangerous he is and good luck on trying to win the second game. Still, another great trip and honestly its becoming of the those events of the year that is slowly becoming an amazing tradition and vacation in itself.

I can’t stress enough how much fun I had over the weekend, but now that footballs back, its time to get serious. With that being said, good luck this season boys. I’ll take one Mahomes please!
Waiver Wire Nerds
A new segment I will be adding looks to judge and highlight some of the most crucial activity that is fantasy football. Seasons are won and lost on the waiver wire and it can sometimes can pay big dividends. I know everyone has lost against that lucky guy who picked up someone the week before and ended up getting 20+ points off said guy. I will be doing Waiver Wire winners and losers the following week, which highlights those that made good picks and those that fucked themselves over. In addition we will also highlight trades, so people please don’t forget this is also a part of the game.
Notable Pickups:
- Kevin picking up Bilal Powell for Jerick McKinnon
- Bob picking up Dez Bryant (FA) for Marcus Mariota
- Shea picking up Matt Breida for DJ Moore
First Thoughts (will be Tiered Power Rankings next week)
Justin First Impression; Its hard to believe that this good of a team came from Justin. I swear watching him and my dad at the draft was something out of a sitcom. This team actually looks solid when looking at the starters. There are some good bright spots, but also some questions as well.
What I like; David Johnson, Jaguars D, Michael Thomas
David Johnson, hes on a prove it year. If he can stay healthy and prove he can still produce, this mans gonna get some money. So it’s in his best interest to play good. I am a DJ believer. The Jaguars Defense is fucking scary. They remind me of the Broncos when they won the Superbowl, the best tandem of CBs and a mean pass rush. This Defensive could actually score enough on its own to be meaningful and playing in a mediocre division, this could be a weekly factor. Michael Thomas is one of the more consistent top receivers in this league. Last year he only had 2 games below 10 points and some of his best games came during playoffs. Brees still slings it and with the emergence of Kamara, the deep ball is starting to look like another option for the Saints.
What I don’t like; Patrick Mahomes, LeSean Mccoy, John Brown
The second most memorable event of the draft was probably Justin drafting Patrick Mahomes. If you want a good recreation, ask Darcy. It’s just too hard to do in writing, you kinda had to be there. The kid has a deep ball and I’m counting on him hitting Tyreek Hill a couple of times. But I just don’t see it happening consistently enough. The Chiefs were in a good spot to win the AFC West this year, but now doesn’t look like it anymore. LeSean McCoy is about to get beat up this year. He has Pedermen starting at QB. This is the same QB that threw 5 picks in a half. 5 fucking picks. Tyrod Taylor who had been benched only threw 4 picks the entire season. Yeah, I’m not so sure about Shady this year. John Brown is like a one trick pony, he basically just runs one route. Go route. Run as fast as you can and catch the ball when it comes to you. He had that one year of 1000 years but that was it. However with a new start away from the Cardinals, it may prove to be beneficial. Of course this is all speculation…
Prediction; 6–7 I think an alright team but the RB’s scare me. QB is also not the strongest as well. Although depending on the rest of the division, there is a chance for some post season play.
Noah First Impression; Oh no baby, what is you doing? Of course it’s Noah that drafted Le’Veon Bell on the season that he looks like he’s gonna hold out. He also has Mark Ingram Suspended. If these guys return and dominate, this team looks much better but it could be too late.
What I like; Jordan Reed, Royce Freeman, AJ Green
Alex Smith likes throwing to his Tight Ends. Jordan Reed is made of glass, but is sharp as the jalapeno shits. He runs routes like a wide receiver and can have big games when healthy. The thing is he has never been healthy but while he has been and if this can be sustained, this is a good pick. Royce Freeman, I knew from listening to training camp this guy was gonna be the starter. The Broncos historically have liked to run a bell cow RB system. I don’t see him sharing much except for maybe on 3rd downs. However the Broncos offense is into question this season, but I like the fresh legs that the new Rolls Royce is bringing. Broncos offense this season is still predicated on establishing the run so Freeman will get his chances. AJ Green, if there is a Bengal to have, its this man. He will catch the ball even if triple teamed. He is probably the only reason Dalton has a job in Cincinnati. Yeah this mother fuckers good.
What I don’t like; Derek Carr, Brandon Cooks, Matt Bryant
I don’t think Derek Carr is anything more than average and with what has happened to the Raiders this off season, I think hes gonna have a bad start and go into a slump for the season. Brandon Cooks, in New England was covered on most deep routes and seems to be replacing the “decoy” that Sammy Watkins was on the Rams. I hope that’s not the case but if he really was a top wide receiver, you would think he and Tom Brady would have done more. I remember when Brady had Moss. Lastly, Matt Bryant. Last year he was historically inaccurate despite still kicking a lot of field goals. As I have mentioned elsewhere, the Falcons Offensive Coordinator is playing for his job. I see much more successful red zone conversions. Also, Matt Bryant looks eerily similar to Noah as well.
Prediction; 5–8. With 2 potentially game winning running backs out early in the season, it will be a matter if he can make up the difference. If he can survive early in the season, I think Noah makes the playoffs this year. If not, it will be another repeat of failure.
Shea First Impression; I was super pumped during and after the draft. I think some people aren’t believing in my team, but this is a team full of play makers. I wanted play makers this year, they can win match-ups on their own. We will see if this is just as strong as of a team last year but I know I will be winning some weekly highs.
What I like; Josh Gordon, Derrick Henry, Christian McCaffrey
3 words. Flash Motherfucking Gordon. This is the theme of my draft.
The only wide receiver in NFL history to have back to back 200+ yard games. I think one of those was against the Patriots also… Yeah this guys got the ability to make big plays anytime he gets the ball, and he wants that payday. I expect big games from this lad. For those worried about the QB situation, who did he have throwing to him before? Oh yeah… 200 yards with that trash? I think hes gonna be good this year. Derrick Henry is unchained. Yes they picked up Dion Lewis, but Henry's getting goal line carries and with how Mariota’s been playing, I think the Titans may lean on running the ball in. This guy is fast, like deceptively fast. People look at him like a bruiser but he can go when he gets open space. Oh yea, speaking of which, Christian McCaffrey. He gets as many receptions as some top tier receivers and he gets carries. In a PPR league, this snowflake dominates. Cam Newtons been getting too many concussions, CMac about to get those goal line TD’s.
What I don’t like; Ty Montgomery, Jake Elliot, Blake Bortles
Not sure about Ty Montgomery, he is like the poor mans CMac, on food stamps. He does the same thing but he rarely has been able to get on the field. He had a few big games but until Jamal Williams gets hurt, I don’t think hes going to be the lead back, good news tho, is that Green Bay RB’s do get hurt. Jake Elliot would think to be a good option but the Eagles didn’t get many field goal shots. They score TD’s. I’m hoping they come back to earth this year but if not, Jake Elliots gonna be lackluster. And of course, its Blake Bortles, picked up because of the pressure to Tyrod Taylor (he won’t crumble) to fail so they can play Baker Mayfield. With a good run game and amazing defense, the game isn’t in his hands, Garbage Time Bortles is dead.
Prediction; 8–5. 3 great running backs and 2 explosive play-making WR’s. I get people are not on the Cleveland hype train. I am. If not I have great depth to help substantiate. Yeah, its gonna be a good season. See you guys in the playoffs.
Tony First Impression; Great starting RB and possibly the best TE in the game right now. However there is some questions as to the rest of the bench as whether or not this team could go the distance.
What I like; Todd Gurley, Devontae Adams, Travis Kelce
Todd Gurley has a defense. Goff is still not widely considered a good QB so teams like this will want to run and control the ball. Gurleys also a good powerful runner that people forget has some wheels. Could be a candidate for best back this year. Devontae Adams with Aaron Rodgers? Yes please. Say what you want about him not being a big name but with Aaron Rodgers, you just gotta have a pulse and he’ll do the rest. And Rodgers just got paid. Yeah this looks good. Lastly, Travis Kelce. As a Bronco fan, I watched this guy fucking make a fool out of our team. Hes a big TE, can block, hes actually fucking got some wheels, and hes white, so you know hes scrappy. Even with Mahomes throwing to him, this guy is still dangerous and capable of putting up WR1 numbers.
What I don’t like; Sony Michel, Allen Hurns, Allen Robinson
I dumped Sony Michel after I did some research into him. He’s hurt again and apparently this is pretty much his life. Hes been hurt in grade school and in college. This guy just gets hurt and I think his ACL is nonexistent or something like that, I remember reading something about how its bone on bone which isn’t bad for the NFL but RIP the rest of this guys life after football. Allen Hurns, a product of the volume by Bortles from Jacksonville. He’s really not that good of a receiver. However with questions as to who the receivers are in Dallas, he may still get a chance… and probably blow it. Allen Robinson, same story, that garbage time Bortles made these receivers look good but now hes in Chicago. I can’t remember the last time they had a good wide receiver. Probably before I started watching football.
Prediction; 7–6, WR depth is gonna hurt this team. Solid QB options and honestly Drake will probably be a good RB means they have alot of scoring power so I see probably making the playoffs.
Tim First Impression; A solid all around team that has talent in all departments. He has a good QB and QB prospect along with at least one stud WR and RB. Followed in by Zach Ertz, on paper this team seems good.
What I like; Julian Edelman, Kareem Hunt, Deandre Hopkin
Julian Edelman is Brady’s second favorite target behind Gronkowski. Picking him up late even though suspended, will guarantee he will get a good WR pick up later so combination he has going for him will only be better. Personally I am a big fan of picking up some of these players as it always seems like 1 star guy goes down early and if it happens to be your team, you want to have some insurance. Kareem Hunt was a high pick from me last year and I love the pick. The Cheifs run the ball and we know they like their bell cow back. Hunt is set to have a good year but there is some question as to whether or not, Mahomes, can do good. If not it will be just like Dallas vs the Broncos last year were we shut down Zeke and then watched as their QB failed to do anything. Lastly, Deandre Hopkins has put up big numbers when hes had literally garbage throwing him the balls. With a healthy Watkins, this man is flat out dangerous.
What I don’t like; T.Y. Hilton, R Jones, Carolina D/ST
T.Y. Hilton is risky, with Luck coming back after missing an entire year and even then there was talk about him possibly missing some time, we’ll have to see. Luck didn’t look that amazing in preseason, so this is a pick that could end up biting Tim in the ass. Ronald Jones, LOL! I paid attention to some of the buzz around training camp and even Tampa Bays coaches, who usually say nice generic things about players were talking about this guys bad hands and ability. I think hes 3rd string now. Drop Asap. Lastly, Carolina. They have Luke Keichely, but that’s it. And his ass is concussion prone. I think you may just want to drop this one and stream defenses.
Prediction; 8–5, makes playoffs and possibly a deep playoff run. The lack of a 2nd power house RB is what may make this team questionable.
Logan First Impression; Good QB, 2 Solid RB’s and what I think a good pair of starting WR’s, this team is similar to a few teams in our league where the starting talent is good but questions come off the bench as to what flexibility and options that will be possible further down the season.
What I like; Ezekiel Elliot, Marquis Goodwin, Michael Gallup
Ezekiel Elliot is the Dallas Cowboys. When he is playing, they usually do well as they force feed him the ball like John Elway tried to force Paxton Lynch to start. However unlike Lynch, Elliot can play. We know he will get his fare share of touches and because Dak hasn’t really taken that step forward to be come a good QB, they may have to rely on Elliot more this season. Marquis Goodwins is Garrapolos boy. If you watched any games from last year, its obvious who Jimmy’s favorite target is. I personally wanted him, however the only thing that scares me is that Jimmy Garrapolo has had some games on tape, teams may try to just double Goodwin and then I fear he won’t be such the value pick. But Goodwin is also fast, which gives him the potential for the deep ball, I like it. Finally, another Cowboy, me and Logan being CSU Rams had the pleasure of watching Michael Gallup play and with Dez Bryant being released, the Cowboys don’t have many receiving options. I expect this guy to start making him a name of himself down the line. I mean c’mon, the guys last name is Gallup, its obvious the Cowboys want him to do good.
What I don’t like; Dan Bailey, Theo Riddick, Danny Amedola
Someone should tell Logan that Dan Baileys been cut. Also, a RB from Detroit, this is scary. They have not had one consistent runner since Barry Sanders. I think they had 1 season of a Healthy Javahd Best (forgive me if I spelled that wrong) and I think that was the most promising. Since then, what usually happens is, one back gets 100 yards, gets hurt the next game or the backup is the one with the good game. I think if enough people get hurt and Theo Riddick is left standing, could be ok, but he hasn’t done anything to really impress me and this is like what, his 4th year in the league? Danny Amendola, going to Miami. If I remember correctly, the Patriots picked up Wes Welker form Miami, similar profile, however Welker was ass on Miami. RIP Danny.
Prediction; 7–6 Looks good on paper, but there are some questionable picks and if the WR group doesn’t quite pan out, this team is really going to rely on Cam and the RB’s. Still probably squeaks into the playoffs.
Bob First Impression; When I first saw this team, I immediately thought of Ben. This seems like the team he would pick. some Giants heavy hitters with a bit of Lions added in. This team doesn’t seem like quite the powerhouse as other teams have but this team in my opinion has good depth and with depth comes flexibility.
What I like; Jack Doyle, Stephon Diggs, O’Dell Beckham Jr
What more could be said about Jack Doyle that Luck couldn't say himself.
With that being said, a broken QB coming back loves his short options and Jack Doyle gives him that. While its looking like the Colts wide outs may be feast of famine, Jack Doyle should have some stability. Stephon Diggs coming back with a better overall QB? Whatever your opinion is, by far Kirk Cousins has a better deep ball. I personally think hes the better QB. I really like Stephon Diggs, the guy runs good routes and hes quick. O’Dell Beckham Jr, despite whatever opinion you have of his on the field antics you can’t lie that hes a fucking unstoppable receiver. Hes tall, got amazing catch radius, catches balls with one hand like behind the back and you won’t catch him in a footrace. In light of last years Giants team, this guy single handily brings their offense into respect. With new addition of Barkley, hes gonna have more space.
What I don’t like; Joe Mixon, Kelvin Benjamin, Dez Bryant
To be honest, everything except AJ Green on the Bengals makes me uneasy. Same is with Joe Mixon. I think he beat up some women too. Idk last year it was Zeke beating up his girlfriend, this year it’s Mixon, who actually has video of him punching a women in the head at a some restaurant I think. Just connecting the dots here is all. Tin foil hat off so Kelvin Benjamin can use it to wrap up his leftovers. Wait, no its Kelvin Benjamin, what am I talking about, there would be no leftovers. On a bleak Buffalo Bills team, I think he’ll spend more time at the buffet than in the red zone. Also Dez Bryants not on a team. Supposedly hes gonna sign late with some contender but I think the problem is his asking price. You can get other wide receivers that are probably younger, faster and less drama for that $$. The fact he had the audacity to post about how Cleveland wanted to sign him as a joke, yet no one else has reached out to him. *Thinking*
Prediction; As much as I kid this is a decent team. However I had Stafford break my heart too many times. 6–7 is where I see this team at, however if one of the people I made fun of comes alive, this team could be 7–6.
Kevin First Impression; This team has some great wide receivers. Its almost obvious right away. Aside from starting QB, everything else is under scrutiny.
What I like; Antonio Brown, Doug Baldwin, Russell Wilson
The first year I had AB, I won. The second year I did bad. By this logic, hes due for another good year. With Bell being out, there is a chance that he may not get as many open looks since they will look to put more pressure, but this also means Ben Roethlisberger may try to target him more in 3rd downs. Next part is the duo of Doug Baldwin and Russell Wilson. Russell Wilson somehow always finishes as a top 5 QB despite known for having slow starts. Doug Baldwin is his man. And is also the only guy returning to that offense is familiar with. In a perfect situation, Baldwin will start hot early as Wilson gets friendly with the rest of the team until the torch gets passed to Wilson later in the season.
What I don’t like; Bilal Powell, Tyler Eifert, Carlos Hyde
I am not sold on the Jets offense. Bilal is questionable to me. With a rookie QB, they may just sell out on the run and force Sam Darnold to throw to win. If Darnold cannot do this, Bilals trash. Tyler Eifert is questionable as well. Hes injury prone, questionable offense. He will probably have a couple of good games but can he stay consistent? I don’t know, I am not a believer of Andy Dalton being a serviceable QB. As for Carlos Hyde, hes gone to the Browns. He was a long time 49'er but even then he wasn’t that impressive. His 2016 season was best but still mediocre. Until I see otherwise I’m not sold yet.
Prediction; 5–8, I just don’t see the firepower to win early enough to stay in the mix. I think he will lose come games early on and put him in an early must win situation. He will have to be reliant on some crucial waiver wire picks to stay ahead.
Darcy First Impression; If we go off just bare projections, this team looks fantastic. There is some ok depth to this team as well. I don’t know how he does it but fucking Darcy, just always has a good team coming off the draft.
What I like; Aaron Rodgers, Alvin Kamara, Julio Jones
Aaron Rodgers is gonna make everyone regret passing on him again just like in that draft.
Yeah hes gonna be itching to light up the NFL again. With Jimmy Graham, I think Rodgers gunning for MVP. Speaking of which, Alvin Kamara, where the fuck did this guy come from. Hes fucking fly like McFly. Every expert says his ass is gonna regress but its the Saints. Drew Brees and company, man you can’t just focus on one guy. Brees is a Hall of Fame QB, he will pick you apart if you try to focus too much on Kamara. Lastly Julio Jones. Atlanta has too much offensive power to be as shitty as they were last year. Their offensive coordinators job is on the line so you know he wants to put up numbers. No better way to do this than to get the ball to Julio Jones.
What I don’t like; Adam Thielen, Marshawn Lynch, James White
I am not a believer in Adam Thielen. A lot of his big plays came from Case Keenum scrambling and the play falling apart. Cousins doesn’t scramble as much, he is shift in the pocket, but Case would just take off running outside the pocket creating disarray in the secondary. I think hes going to come back to earth. Marshawn Lynchs best years were in Seattle. The guy had two good games for someone who played the entire season. Oh sure hes healthy after taking off a season, anyone remember where he missed a game after getting hurt in KC? Yeah, hes not as healthy and he isn’t quite the beast mode he used to be, not to mention the locker room issues that Oakland is having. Lastly, James fucking White. Everyone knows about him because he occasionally has this short spree where he goes off. He’ll have a 15 point game, 16 point game, then follow it up with like a couple of 2 point games. With Sony Michel, who knows any more with James White.
Prediction; 9–4, I can see Darcy taking off where left off last season. This teams only weakness is a flex but there so many options for this that its hardly an issue, probably the strongest team coming into week 1.
Miguel First Impression; Someone has to tell Miguel that we aren’t playing poker, this 3–4 QB thing don’t work like that. Real talk though, this is a team that is built on its starters. The lack of depth worries me if his players get hurt and on bye weeks, but aside from injuries, this team looks good on paper.
What I like; Deshaun Watson, Larry Fitz, Melvin Gordon
Deshaun Watson looked like the Savior for the Texans last season. I’d expect him to lead right where he left off but probably want to temper those expectations at first, since teams will have had some game tape on him and be able to study him a bit more. Not like Miguel cares, hes got 2 other good QBs on his team. Deshaun if healthy, is a dangerous point machine. Always someone gets Larry Fitzgerald and I gotta be honest, hes like a poor mans Jerry Rice. Not the fastest but is always open and gets a lot of catches. They must be both drinking out of the same glass as Fitzgerald is hardly injured either. Lastly Melvin Gordon coming into a slightly healthier Charger team which usually means they will try to run the ball more as they should have a better team coming out of the AFC West. I would expect to see a monster year from him this year as he tries to make people forget about that Fantasy God LT.
What I don’t like; Devontae Booker, Dalvin Cook, Amari Cooper
I knew from the day of the draft that Booker wasn’t gonna remain the start, the guy goes down from contact from a butterfly. Hes not fast, the only thing he seems to be good at is picking up the rush but even then, hes not the preferred 3rd down back. Dalvin Cook got injured last year and with a not impressive offensive line in Minnesota, I feel like hes gonna have a tough year. Still the addition of Kirk Cousins could make this pick come out ok, but I am weary of picking up RBs after a big injury. Still there was that one Minnesota RB that came back…. Lastly, Amari “stone fucking hands that couldn’t hold on to a ball even if you surgically attached it to his fucking hands” Cooper. I will never forget as Derek Carr hit this fucker in the $$ 3 plays in a row in the end zone and he dropped all 3. Terrible pick.
Prediction; 7–6, Unfortunately you can only play 1 QB and while Miguel's QBs are top of the line, I don’t know if it will be enough. I think he may squeak in playoffs depending on how the division turns out.
Power Rankings
- Darcy
- Shea
- Tim
- Miguel
- Tony
- Logan
- Bob
- Justin
- Noah
- Kevin
Weekly Matchups
So this week will probably pretty lack luster, I wanted to make sure this was done before the games started, next week I’ll go more in depth into this part.
Shea vs Miguel: Miguel has the edge in QB for sure. Outside that, I match up if not exceed at every other part. Miguel has to have the Rams D/ST play amazing, if they put up 15+, Miguel probably wins. But Vegas has the Rams losing…
Shea wins
Darcy vs Logan: Well, it wouldn’t make much sense to call the Darcy the best team and then have him lose in week one right?
Darcy wins
Kevin vs Tim: Bilal will have to impress in order for me to believe. Antonio Brown with Bell, there is seems to be just too much that is going on for me to believe in this team and Wilson starts slow.
Tim Wins
Noah vs Bob: I think Noah has upset potential, but with his 2 best running backs either suspended or holding out, it looks tough. However, its Barkley and Odell vs the Jaguars. If there is a chance for an upset its probably this one. However its week one, we most likely won’t see anything too crazy.
Bob wins
*Game of the week* Tony vs Justin: For the game of the week, its the battle of the two people who were probably the highlight of the draft. QB’s across the board look even, RB’s will probably go to Tony, as mentioned before I am not sure about Shady. WR’s goes back to Justin however. TE’s are for sure with Tony. Defense is Justin. Kickers, who cares. This looks very even. But were talking Todd Gurley vs a Mack-less Oakland. I think Gurley will make the difference this week.
Tony Wins
Predictions
0–0 for now.
Accepting alcohol donations for writing these write-ups.