Phrases Guaranteed to Send Copywriters into a Rage

punttim via Pixabay

“Can you make this sentence ‘stronger’?”

“Don’t you just work online?”

“Hey, this 50-page document needs to go out in 10 minutes. Edit it before it goes out? You’re the best!”

*Finds one mistake in copy* “Ha, I thought you were supposed to be *good* at your job!”

“We need to fit all five marketing initiatives in these 120 characters. That’s not a problem, right?”

“Here’s an email I need to send out. Read over it. You’re the words person.”

“What’s that word that means ‘indicate’ but isn’t indicate? Like, you know what I’m saying?”

Merriam-Webster via Amazon

“This copy just doesn’t ‘pop’”

“Oh sorry, did you want me to track changes?”

“We’re looking to turn this around next week. I’ll get you details ASAP”

“We need an eBook done by EOD Friday. No, no word limit in mind. Yeah, we don’t really know what it’ll look like either.”

“It’s just 250 words. That’ll take what, thirty minutes? Wait, you want *how* much for it?”

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“This sounds ‘weird.’ Fix it.”

“I don’t know. The copy just isn’t working. I can’t explain why.”

“You’ll get great exposure!”

“I don’t like Google Docs. Gonna have to be Word. Thanks!”

“Sorry, I printed it off and wrote notes on it. Hope you can read my handwriting.”

Class Blog

“I passed my college English classes. I write good.”

“No, this meeting is just for the designers. We’re not ready for copy yet.”

“With everything optimized for SEO, we expect all of your content to go viral. That’s how it works. Duh.”

“Neil Patel said you need one-sentence paragraphs. No one reads two sentences or more in a paragraph. Actually, don’t even bother with entire sentences. Phrases and clauses are now paragraphs.”

“We don’t have a direction yet, but if you could go ahead and get started, we’ll let you know when you are getting off track.”

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Orlando-based Content Marketing Strategist // Sometimes I write the funny things. Sometimes I write the serious things.

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