In Spirit and In Truth

I’ve been contemplating what it means to worship the Lord, both in Spirit and in truth. I have had many struggles in the realm of worship and have had to fight my lack of motivation to engage in worship — whether it’s at a Sunday morning service or throughout my week. I have not only failed to developed a habit of worhip, I have indeed, lost my heart to worship.

I know that there are many people out there that want to hold to the image that they have carefully crafted on Facebook, but this “cropped & edited” version of life just isn’t real. In all honesty it isn’t doing anyone any service either. My average week is pretty much spent managing chaos. Balancing several jobs to support my wife and five children has its toll, not only on the mind but on the spirit as well. If I even find time in my day to pray I feel like I spend most of that time repenting for having such a poor attitude throughout my day, how I was short or rude with my wife, yelled at the kids, was passive aggressive, or just flat out mad at God. It is in this moment that I realized that it’s ok. God knows my heart. He knows that even though I am fighting mad that I long for His presence in my life and yearn for His help. He wants nothing more for me to be honest with Him, even if I am yelling at him for the things that are happening in my life. He doesn’t want my “cropped & edited” religious, ritualistic, fake worship.

“Keep your life free from love of money, and be content with what you have, for he has said, “I will never leave you nor forsake you.” -‭‭Hebrews‬ ‭13:5‬ ‭ESV‬‬

The Lord is my helper and He promises that he will never leave nor forsake me. I have to acknowledge the fact that I have not been inviting the Lord’s help in my life. I have been trying to do it through my own strength which has done nothing but left me tired and worn out. How can I expect to grow spiritually and not give myself to spiritual things. I’ve been flexing physically but my spirit has been slowing growing weak. It is essential that I set aside time to spend with the Lord or else I will die spiritually and leave myself susceptible to sin. All too often the busyness of life gets to me. It often does nothing other than make me focus more on myself and think far more selfishly. I lose sight of the fact that I should be laying my life down for others. I lost sight of the most important thing and that is being thankful. There’s so much I have to be thankful for and when I lose sight of that, the posture of my heart shifts to a place of ungratefulness and I become more concerned with the things that I feel God is withholding from me. I must give all I have to God, laying down my will for His.

“I appeal to you therefore, brothers, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God, which is your spiritual worship.” -‭Romans‬ ‭12:1‬ ‭ESV‬
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