3.b Self-Media in China | Chauvinism of parents is the pain of the daughter
by Mimon, Jan. 2017, English Translation
Will be Grateful if there’re people helping me out on translations; WeChat ID: Sheldon793
The follow-up development of Chen Sicheng’s derailment incident can be summarized in one sentence:
I am derailed, I am flying, I am messing around, but I am still a good husband.
Because my wife loves me for 10,000 years.
On the one hand, Chen Sicheng’s straight male cancer speech and the small three small four continue to be exposed.
Chen Sicheng once said in an interview that “sometimes it is right to suspect polygamy.” The motivation of many successful people is “to have more women”. “This is an unavoidable desire, and people are too concerned about moral values”… …
During the publicity period of “Chinatown Detective Case”, he was asked why the female lord chose 佟丽娅, and Chen Sicheng used four words because 佟丽娅 was “good and cheap.”
On materialized women, I only serve Chen Sicheng.
According to the All-Star blast, Chen Sicheng had a small three named Wang Tianchu, who bought her Mercedes.
Chen Sicheng also has a small three called Ye Xi, who once participated in the “Chinatown Detective Case.”
That is to say, when Chen Sicheng was filming, he derailed under the eyes of Julia, and both the main room and the junior team were also a real group, real arrogant.
The general idea is that I hope that my daughter will endure, and as long as she is patient, she will be happy.
Husband who is habitually derailed, is this open-minded and wise?
Ok, I can only say that you are happy.
Before, when Julia’s father went to “Happy Camp”, she expressed his straight male cancer speech with great enthusiasm:
The amount of information in this passage is quite large, and it is the essence of patriarchal thinking.
Married daughter, splashed out of the water.
A woman is not a person, just a property, transferred from one family to another. A woman is controlled by patriarchy before marriage, and is controlled by her husband after marriage. She does not have independent personality and free will.
A woman is married to serve a man.
The word “serving” is really shocking. It is said that it is serving, and the posture is so humble. What is the relationship between the husband and the two?
This makes it easier to understand why Julia will say, “It doesn’t matter if a man is derailed, just go home.”
Netizen Yu Lanyi evaluates Julia, “following a straight male cancer family, transporting it to a straight male cancer family, and matching it to the mouth.”
This incident made me start thinking about another problem — many times, women did not want to forgive the scum, wanted to divorce, and wanted to start again, but their parents would always say:
“I have to endure, and it’s not too late to live with anyone. Don’t be tossed.”
“Divorce, with children, who wants you, can only find worse than him.”
“For the sake of the children, you can’t leave. Besides, how the relatives and neighbors see you after leaving.”
This kind of parent who would rather let her daughter die in an unfortunate marriage and not agree with her daughter’s divorce, is it still less?
Perhaps, more terrible than the scum husband, is a straight male cancer parents.
It’s only a while to meet the scum husband.
When you meet a straight male cancer parent, it is a lifetime.
02
I remembered the incident of a 31-year-old mother jumping with her two children.
The party wrote a 15-page suicide note, accused her husband of derailment and domestic violence, and she said that “the mourning is greater than the death of the heart.”
Among the suicides, what made me most embarrassed was what she said to her mother:
Her husband was derailed, she was violently abused by her husband, and her mother advised her to be atmospheric and tolerate.
She endured, and the result was that she had depression and ended in suicide.
Is there anything more tragic than this ending?
My colleague’s distant cousin is the same.
When she was pregnant for 8 months, she found her husband derailed. She insisted on divorce. Her parents disagreed and advised her to endure;
She gave birth to a child only 4 months, still breastfeeding, her husband hit her on the street, all kinds of punches and kicks, was also taken by passers-by, uploaded to Weibo.
This time she couldn’t stand it. She took her child back to her family. Her husband didn’t come to her, and she didn’t care about her.
The mouth around her maiden was so broken that she couldn’t stand it anymore. Her mother started to go home and said, “Don’t think about it, for the sake of the child, you should go back!”
She said, “But I will be beaten when I go back…”
Her mother said, “Which family doesn’t have a small fight, don’t say it is so serious! Besides, he is a good person, why do you want to hit you? It must be that you didn’t do well, a slap in the face, You must be wrong too!”
She was really desperate and said, “Do you want to watch me be killed by others?”
Her mother said, “I am your mother, can I still harm you? Listen to me, go back and recognize your man and continue to live. Don’t be so selfish, patronize yourself, you have to think about it, you I am getting married, so I am still at home, where is my father’s old face?”
She understands this.
It turns out that her mother cares, not her life and death, but her own face.
However, she can only return to her husband’s house — even if it is hell.
Because she has no retreat.
Just like Julia said on the blog in 2008, she went to the grave. “Da Bo said, this is our family’s graveyard. Every son and daughter-in-law have already reserved their position, but there is no mine because my future belongs to others. Home, it seems that death can not be reunited with family. This is the rule!”
She is a daughter, and sooner or later she is an outsider.
If the parents do not agree to her divorce and do not accept her marriage failure, then she is really homeless.
The scum male is derailed and will not be rebellious;
The wife did not forgive the derailed scum male, but the congregation rebelled.
Can it be more ridiculous?
03
Why do these Chinese parents treat their daughter like this?
With all due respect, many parents in China are straight male cancer.
Their mentality is:
First, if you marry, it is someone else’s family. If you are outsiders, parents should not take care of them.
“Mother who is married, splashed out of water”, even if you have a problem with your marriage, it is also a matter for you and your husband’s family. Don’t move back to your home, it’s ugly.
Second, the value of a woman is reflected in marriage. If you divorce, your life will fail.
Chinese parents are the easiest to inadvertently derogate the value of their daughters.
“When a woman is 25 years old, she is devalued.”
“You are divorced, it is worthless, who wants you.”
For them, marriage = happiness; not married = life is better than death.
Just like a paragraph spread on the Internet: You are busy gathering, climbing, and traveling every day. In the eyes of your friends, your days are full and beautiful, but in the eyes of your parents, you are just a nervous person who is too old to marry…
Your marriage is unfortunate and stronger than single.
This is the sort of value of Chinese parents.
This is also the reason why they are crazy about their daughter’s forced marriage and against her daughter’s divorce.
Third, you are divorced, not only do you lose face, we are parents, and our faces are dull.
What they care most about is face.
They will think that if a daughter is divorced, she will be shamed to herself, add to the family, and let herself lift her head in front of others.
As long as you look at the family, you can do it.
Was beaten by my husband, how can it be pointed out by everyone?
In their subconscious mind, you would rather be abused to death in your marriage, and you will not be drowned by saliva after your divorce.
Fourth, “persuade and do not persuade points”, “home and everything”, marriage is not all living together, talk about the quality of marriage, love!
The marriage of the last generation is to live together.
Therefore, in the eyes of many parents, “quality of marriage” is a nonsense.
Domestic violence, derailment, endure is over, it is true that you are not right.
They feel that their daughters are more tolerant and humble, and they can win happiness.
As everyone knows, unprincipled patience and humility will only lead to scorn and indifference.
04
Many times, this kind of thinking of Chinese parents is to encourage the arrogance of the scum male.
They thought it was good for their daughter, but they became the accomplice of the scum man.
Then, when the daughter meets the scum, what should parents do?
What parents should do most is to give their daughters a sense of security.
Let your daughter know that no matter what time, parents are your strong backing.
Instead of pushing her daughter out, she was wronged by her husband and was rejected by her family.
One of my interns said that her sister is a flight attendant. When her brother-in-law was derailed during pregnancy, her parents were all blown up.
Her dad called the son-in-law directly and asked him: “Do you think we are far away, so bully?!”
The next day, her parents went directly to her brother-in-law’s house by plane and asked her family to discuss the argument. It was said that her father was seven meters away.
Her mother also comforted her sister and said, “Don’t worry, you want to divorce and get divorced. When you come back, your parents will raise you! Your children’s parents will help you raise them, let the slag men roll!”
It is unfortunate for a woman to meet a scum man. At this time, the family needs to stand firmly on her side.
Finally, I want to share a video with you, a foreign girl married, her father’s speech at the wedding.
