12 Ways A World Where the Beatles Never Existed Would Actually Be Different
by Sheryl K. Zohn
1. Jesus would still be unsure where he stands popularity-wise.
2. Charles Manson would have successfully kicked off an apocalyptic race war by whipping his followers into a frenzy with Neil Diamond’s “Sweet Caroline.”
3. Las Vegas would have one less Cirque Du Soleil show.
4. The first pop song to reference LSD would have been “Larry in the Solarium with Dinosaurs.”
5. Mark David Chapman would best be known for his break-through literary analysis of “Catcher in the Rye.”
6. Tourist traffic fatalities would be greatly reduced on Abbey Road.
7. The first rock ’n’ roll concept album would be credited to the band Styx for their “Mr. Roboto” opus.
8. Yoko Ono would have broken up the Beach Boys.
9. Submarine exterior colors would continue to go completely unnoticed by the general public.
10. The Traveling Wilburys would have been down one Wilbury.
11. “Beatlemania” would be solely a scientific term to describe musically-induced mental illness in insects.
12. Nostalgic films shamelessly aimed at Baby Boomers would be 5–100% shorter.
Despite not being a Baby Boomer, Sheryl K. Zohn does have a favorite Beatles album. Guess which one it is.
