Oversharing
First of all, how is it September already?!?! Fully aware this makes me sound a hundred years old, I still just keep saying that. Not that I’m complaining about some fall weather. Please — stop with the hot, steamy nonsense already. It’s hard enough looking presentable these days, let alone adding humid hair to the mix. Lots o’ hats for Jurrie.
Quick update: my delivery could not have gone better. Dr. Kyzer made me as comfortable as I could possibly be with oxygen, anti-nausea meds, and her super chill disposition. Jude made his arrival with no complications and I even got to hold him while they finished the surgery!
He’s 7 weeks as of yesterday and I’m just now starting to see some hope that he’ll give me longer sleeping stints at night. I’m guessing because of his size (already over 12lbs…thankin’ Jesus again for that C-section), he eats all the dang time. And I’m feeling conflicted/guilty about it. Let the oversharing begin…
My boobs hurt. My boobs leak. My boobs are absolutely obscene and may never ever return to their former, hard-earned glory. Yes, I realize this is all part of the sacrifice (this is my second time around the breastfeeding block) but this guy has been rufffff. Baby boy went from nighttime cluster feeding back to back, left to right, 5 and 6 hours at a time to the point of drawing blood to even now needing to eat at least every 2 hours. And if he’s not eating, I’m pumping. It’s the non-stop milk cycle of doom.
Sure, I brought it on myself having a baby while David is on tour and I’m in my first year of law school (just casually mentioning this, I know) but timing has never been my strong suit. Add to it that Jude has a hypersensitive tummy such that e-ver-y-thing I consume affects him way more than I experienced with Liv and suddenly, I’m running on 3 broken hours of sleep a night, no caffeine, and basically bread and water.
All of that to say, I did a bunch of research on options and am officially switching him over to this specialty supplement. Before you suggest it, I’m aware I could do both. But even if his gas/diarrhea/general gastrointestinal unhappiness wasn’t an issue, I added up that I will get 2 hours back per day just from not pumping alone. 2 hours! Ugh. And yet I feel wildly disappointed in myself. Cerebrally, I know its a logical decision. Emotionally, tons of mom guilt.
That being said, I only just began this process last night so grab a Snickers because it’s gonna be a while. Not reaching for the cabbage just yet (Men, feel free to google “cabbage” “breastfeeding”), but the grocery is close if things get lumpy over the next few weeks.
Call me crazy (er) but it’s already making a significant difference. Jude slept longer stretches and had far more chill/not pooping awake periods last night and today. I’m feeling like a massive weight has been lifted off my chest…wow — horrible pun intended! Overall, there’s light at the end of this tunnel and I don’t hear a train.
So, what did I do with my extra time today? Folded laundry, studied for my Crimes exam and finished my LSV1 assignment, of course. Glamorous, I know. But it made me so happy! Apologies for any errors above — I’m not going back and proof-reading; I’m going to bed! Fingers crossed we all get some sleep!!
