Tech Recruitment from Hell
Hi there, this is a deep technologist who is finally and utterly fed up with non-consensual garbage in their inbox. After a fair warning on top of my LinkedIn profile… here’s the blacklist with all-public entries (post Sept 9, 2022) as a helpful guide as to which tech recruitment firms to avoid at all cost.
Because “block & delete” alone does not feel adequate anymore.
Compiled for those tech recruiters who want to do better, i.e. not “tinder away” all the technological expertise from LinkedIn and other business networks, as well as for everyone else who needs a laugh while continuing to shovel the garbage out of their own junk-ridden inboxes.
September 2022
While I am expressedly only open to contractual work in computer forensics, information/cyber security analysis and cyber defense incident response (“casually browsing” for myself and my team), the following individuals sent me garbage as indicated and I urge them to get tech recruitment training as fast as they possibly can book a slot.
Sept 28 // Tom Crozier as the president of Prime 8 Consulting
If people would learn to read, they would see the differences between contractual forensics/analytics (as a service) and short-term employment contracts in network security engineering. May you go boldly back into primary school for those much-needed reading skills. “Go boldly in the direction of your dreams, live the life you have imagined.” Maybe you’ll even find network and cybersecurity engineers there.
Sept 21 // Bill Ward as the director of Jet Consulting
I could not be less inclined to move to Hildesheim, of all places, as an on-site security engineer. Additionally, nothing (!) on my profile points towards any experience with security concepts in QNX as a highly specific requirement for this role…
Sept 17 // Seth Kun with some new space company
As much as your niche is a future industry, I was clearly not interested in getting contacted by even more people needing to fill a senior QA engineering position (remote or in Finland). Especially not on a Saturday.
Sept 16 // Kieren Sowter with Catalyst Careers
What made you think I would be either suitable for a senior quality engineer aka where the heck did you get the 7 years of experience in developing automotive software from — clearly not my profile!?
“CSV engineer” was even less relevant, what a great horrible job you did. Double whammy!
Sept 16 // Josef Belghiti with Storm2
No, Josef, definitely not interested in expanding my network with headhunters, senior or not, belonging to any fintech companies.
Sept 16 // Daniel Lowe with Satoshi Solutions
No, Daniel, I am clearly not interested in a fully remote QA engineering vacancy in the DeFi space, no matter to which extent you think I “might be a great fit”.
