It’s official!!! And the back story…
I put my 2 weeks in!
I did it! I actually did it! I quit my comfortable, secure, Corporate America job and ventured off into the unknown that is my official start of a move towards a state I’ve never really explored, set foot in myself, or set off to make a new life in. I’ve always been cloistered in Michigan.
I’ve lived in Michigan all my life. Minus a year in Washington state and 3–5 months in Tokyo, the majority of my time was in Michigan and I was fine with it. I wasn’t opposed to the idea of living, serving my church, working, and dying in Michigan. I was content with it. I looked forward to it.
Enter 2015. By the end of 2015, I was unemployed, rooming with one of my best friends, and curious as to what to do next. I knew I needed to pay rent and a car payment and fell flat due to the end of a contract. Clueless, I just decided to bide my time and help out my church at the time. This was at Woodside Bible Church, a prolific, multi-site mega church and I loved this place. I loved everything that was happening. I loved the people I was connected to, and they were doing amazing things (and still continue to do so). November 2015 they decided to host Passion Music. Passion Music one of the most premiere church music groups in the Christian music circuit. And they had a fall tour to promote their record “Even So Come” and one of the stops was at the church I was at.
Now I love concerts. I’ve had experience loading in and loading out. I know what it means to setup gear and tear down speakers. With my understanding of live musical settings, I’ve been able to provide some assistance with setting up a stage to help with their concert night. Along with my love concerts, I’ve been a massive fan boy for this group. Passion Music and by default, Passion Conferences has been a staple point for my spiritual development and I’ve always been a cheerleader for them since 2001 so for them to show up on my doorstep 14 years later is nothing short of me living my fanboy dreams of remotely being associated with them. Now they are nothing special in and of themselves and they will tell you that out right. Their mission is to enlarge our perspective on the God they craft songs about and elevate our hearts to see Jesus and make Jesus glorious and ultimate in the songs they help people sing. But that still doesn’t negate the fact that I’m extremely grateful for them and what they do and what they stand for and to help them in this small way was nothing short of amazing!
Interacting with the road crew was great and members of the band as well. Being a guitarist, I immediately was drew to the guitar world. Amps, guitars, pedals, and the like. Between their lead and their rhythm, they had some pretty amazing gear and I love every second I got to run cables, place mics, offer guitar tech support, and everything in between. Then I got to talking with their lead guitarist and he’s such a bro! I mean that only in the best sense; soft spoken, kind, generous, humble, funny, supportive, loving, wise, talented. Did I mention generous because, he gave me his phone number and said call him anytime. Now just because I have it, I wasn’t gonna capitalize on it. Still to this day, I have his number. I only text him letting him know I’m praying for him when he’s got big stuff on his plate like leading at the annual Passion Conferences. He’s such a bro only in the best sense and I love the guy for it! Well, conversation upon jokes upon building friendships and such, I had about 2 instances where they said, “Well you should come on down!” or a derivative of, “We’d love to have you!” Which was such a tempting offer but I had connections and ties here and couldn’t leave all that behind, right? I had prior engagements with the ministry at Woodside, the need for employment, my roommate, and everything else in between and besides, I’m content with living in Michigan. I’m content with cheering on Passion Music and by default, Passion City Church (their home base).
Then the itch. A restlessness. The thought of what if. The building tension of clarity vs confusion. The tension of faith. The understanding of faith. The character of God. The wrestling of motive. The why. The how. The when. The why. The ever notion of why. The internal conflict. The sheer thought of actually doing it.
This has been my tension for the last year and a half or so.
Then I get a job in February. And it’s a decent job. Then I move out and live on my own. Life happens and the savings you were intending on doing happens and it got too expensive to even consider a move. But all the while, I couldn’t shake this sense that I’m not supposed to be in Michigan anymore. I’m fine with being here but it just didn’t seem like I’d be here for long. This job, this apartment, and my final moments at Woodside all felt like closing chapters. I knew I still had to be in church and found one. Left it after 8 months to join another church but then, Corporate America got in the way and basically stranded me away from serving, away from community, away from the things that makes my soul come alive. I couldn’t play, I couldn’t serve a local church expression, and all I had was God. Were there mess ups along the way? Yes. I was still able to get some brotherhood moments in as my best friend still stays connected with me and I with him. But to not help lead musically from my guitar was a strain on the soul and I hated it. I hated not having to serve a church. I hate that I can’t do what I want to do most which is build up musicians to take up the mantle for the next generation. No. Sundays are my work Fridays and I just had to suck it up and make it work. That was the card dealt to me. But it also allowed me to take stock, inventory, and ultimately get clarity.
The wrestling match of motives was the deepest fight. Why did I want to move? What was my motivation? The prayer is always if it doesn’t honor and center You, Jesus, I don’t want it. I’ve reflected back to God what Moses said which is, “… if you’re not moving, we’re not. We only go where You go!” And I second that notion. So the question is, “God are You moving in this direction? Am I to know that this is where you’re pointing me and directing my steps towards?” Then the question came, “Eugene, why do you want to move to Atlanta?” The answer was easy… to serve Passion City Church. There, I said it! Yes, to be involved with Passion City Church. Not to play music, not to be on stage, not to gain notoriety as a part of this movement. Just to be a member of this church in anyway I can. I don’t care if I ever set foot on that stage. I’ll mop up baby vomit and wipe toilets if that means I can be a simple part of this church. Did the notions of notoriety for being a part of PCC come to mind? I wouldn’t be honest if it didn’t but all in all, it’s simply to be a part of that community who is truly doing amazing things there and I want to be a part. Not that there isn’t amazing things going on in Michigan, but with work and such, I can’t be a part of it. I can only observe.
Unbeknowest to me, Someone was working in the background.
My mom had been aching to leave Michigan for a long while. Winters here are dreadful. The cold doesn’t bode well for anyone. And she has not been healthy for a long while and part of that is due to the horrid cold that prevails Michigan for 7 months out of the year. That’s a long time to live with body aches and muscle issues every year. So a new change of weather, a new change of scenery was needed. Little did I know, my mom made the assumption she was also moving for me. I never communicated to her that I want to live in Atlanta. She knew my heart for Passion City Church and my desire to be involved with them. But I never actually stated that I want to be involved, I was just content with being a long distance cheerleader. But then 2015 happened and the job happened and that was that. She made the assumption that I want to be a part of this church so she began planning for Georgia, independent of any interaction with me whatsoever. Then in just a few short months prior to Sunday, I would on occasion visit her and she lets loose the floodgate of information. She’s moving to Georgia and she stated she knew I wanted to go. I told her that I was thinking about going over the last year but I wanted to do it on my own terms so literally we had independant goals and directions. But then again, a mother’s heart is always to her children no matter what, even if they claim they are doing it for themselves. I on the other hand made no effort to let her know what my plans or direction was. I just told I was thinking about relocating to Atlanta.
Call it God, call it coincidence, call it change… call it whatever you like, it was certainly providential. And in providence, my mom invited me to come down with her. I just couldn’t in all honesty because, my lease was up on the 15th but I began planning. I decided the best possible route was for me to live with my best friend and save up money on what I would pay for rent for a few months then relocate in the new year 2018. Well, as God would have it, that fell through. So then the wheels began turning. The ONLY logical step is to end my lease (which I did earlier), pack up and out and drive on down to Georgia. I had nothing else left. So..
Sunday, I put in my two weeks. Being the only one in the office, and two weeks was officially the 13th of August, I let the notification email fly to my managers.
And here we are… my mom helped me with the moving pod and I’ll be packing up everything and leaving on down to Georgia on the 15th.
That being said, it’s still sad. Sad that I’ve connected with so many people. Sad that I’ll be leaving behind so many more.
It’s scary. Scary because I’m venturing into such unknown territory. I’ve never lived anywhere else but Michigan. I know my way around Tokyo better than I do Atlanta. And, I’ll admit it. I’m scared! I’m scared!!!! Atlanta is a crazy, kinetic, phrenetic place. But there’s a vibe to it that I just can’t help but love. And I’m looking forward to seeing what I have to offer there. And this church. I love what they’re doing and how they’re going about doing it and just can’t wait to be a part.
It’s exciting. Exciting because I’m venturing into such unknown territory. I’ve never living anywhere else byt Michigan. I know my way around Tokyo better than I do Atlanta. And, I’ll admit it. I’m excited! I’m excited!!! Atlanta is a crazy, kinetic, phrenetic place. But there’s a vibe to it that I just help but love. And I’m looking forward to seeing what I have to offer there. And this church. I love what they’re doing and how they’re going about doing it and just can’t wait to be a part.
There’s a jumble of emotion in me right now and the last thing I want to be is confused…
If you’re reading this… I could use prayers.
If you want to help, I set up a GoFundMe page at www.gofundme.com/asianmigrationsouthward and send a few bucks my way to help me offset the cost.
But most of all… prayers are needed…