Come on, come on, turn the radio on

It’s Friday night, and it won’t be long

Gotta do my hair, put my make-up on

It’s Friday night, and it won’t be long

It is a favorite song of my little niece and I have it as my ringtone to feel her presence but It’s irritating when you’ve no messages all day but the moment you decide to sprawl on your bed, your phone rings.

2 PM: An unknown international number flashes. I was perturbed and clueless about the caller, intrigued I touch green one!

Hello, I said.

What’s up? A familiar voice of an ancient friend from Switzerland.

Oh, that’s you! Sorry, I took so long since I always expect what’s up call from your side. I snigger!!

“Feeling rich these days.” Having said that “It’s only a feeling.” He said and giggled!!

I always Consider this as a “time pass phone call” when you can merely sitting by and not taking any part in a conversation, in fact, one can even write a deep article on a sublime philosophical subject because you already know there is no such significant business. It’s always the same phone call when we start reminiscing about our past, present and future adventures of life!!

I told him that I switched on my TV connection being careless about our conversation and constantly evolving tv channels as if I am playing Mario (Toing, Toing).”I said

Putting me into a thought of 90’s most popular kids game Mario and we start off talking about Mario game. I told him to learn from Mario. No matter how far the princess is, one should go after her.I suggested him to come to India to meet all the girls selected by his parents for his marriage!!

“You’ve got to be kidding,” he said in disbelief!!you are giving me the example of a game, where I have wasted my entire childhood just to save someone else girlfriend from a fucking dragon. I’ve glitched between things where I’ve died multiple times at various locations, bounced on multiple mushrooms and coins hoping one day I would also get a chance to bounce on peach ( Mario’s girlfriend).specially in my case it’s always the same “your princess is in another castle..”, in fact, peach was never interested in him. Peach is never kidnapped and in reality just trying to get away from Mario. He said in flat voice!!

SILENCE!!I checked out my phone and found out black screen! Why?

The answers vary from ‘stop your boring conversation’ to ‘who’ll charge the battery’!!Blimey

Watching tv was the only option left for me now. I jab at random buttons hoping to watch something good and came across a channel which was broadcasting a beauty pageant show. I stopped my toing toing. I saw so many lineups of judges who lost in anonymity. As usual there were has-been actress, one male model, aging designers, not the most popular of stars, one former beauty pageant winner, one cricketer and of course how could they forget to invite at least one socialite who have puts on tons of makeup even archeological department can dig into it and possibly found out a new civilization like Haripaa and MohanZodaro!!

Two stupid anchors were describing the soul purpose of the event, what former beauties had done for the world and what is the possibility in future. I think the soul purpose is to chisel the Indian womanhood construct for many girls who aspire to enter Bollywood.blimey!!

The swimsuit round was going on, and it was hard to see their waist.”I always maintain a balanced diet which includes fresh fruit and salads, also nurtures my skin time to time”. applaud!!

Then came the best part of any beauty competition –the Q&A round, The flair, confidence with which a contestant answers a question determine how worthy she is of living up to the reputation of the title. My ear was curious to hear some real answer from the contestant, but you can not expect the same if the question is itself stupid, And ta-dah, here it is.

“What are the qualities needed in Miss India and why do you deserve to win today?” sigh

AAsking such kind of stupid questions, judges made it clear that there was no requirement for the contestants to seem erudite, in despair, when you ask a stupid question one should always ready with the highest probability of a stupid answer.

“Miss India should have an emotional stability, humbleness, and confidence and I think I possess them all.” she replies with a grin!!

Well, it’s written in so many miss India forum that apart from the Indian nationality, the candidate should be between 18–25 years of age, Height 5.6″ & above with good vital statistics. She should be robust enough to control on her hormones as she should have never embraced motherhood or have been pregnant earlier or during the phase of the competition. Blink blink

I wonder who is the real bird brain here- Judges, contestants, or Viewers. Well, I had sat through this torture. But nothing had prepared me for this travesty to the world of pageants. We really “miss” a good “Miss India.”!!