Oh, How Lucky Can You Get!
I just won a Dyson vacuum cleaner!
How lucky can you get?
Last week, I won a Smartwatch, I Phone and DeWalt Power Station. I’m not sure what a DeWalt Power Station is but pretty great that I get one!
I also won a golf cart, a fir Christmas Tree from a place called Woodcraft and free sheet music for January selections. Plus a tea that will make sex a miracle! (Too easy…too many punch lines with that one.)
Along with all the free stuff, delivery trucks are lining up to deliver….something…to me as soon as I click on the “tracking buttons.”
I don’t think I’m expecting any deliveries. My Amazon book already arrived. The Christmas ornament I ordered from Woodcraft — the very same folks who now want to give me a fir tree — is stuck somewhere in China. This confounds me. The ad clearly stated “Sent from North Carolina.” Is there a North Carolina in China, maybe in the Guizhou province?
Along with all the free stuff, I’m eligible for special sales — all kinds of merchandise at rock bottom prices: up to 90% off and free shipping. My email is clogged with these deals. There’s hardly any space left for all the political people who need my $5 so that they can defend democracy. Really! Who doesn’t want to defend democracy?
If that isn’t enough, my small donation will unlock the dam of grant money available to cure every current disease plus solve the homeless problem.
Meanwhile, as If I have time left after all this drama, I can play any number of on-line games that will give me important information: which cat or dog suits me, my favorite movie, the color I should be wearing.
Phew! Being me is exhausting!
More specifically, being an older woman who uses a computer nearly every day puts me squarely in the cross hairs of scammers worldwide. All they really need is a little more information — such as my mother’s name, my dog’s name, my favorite flower, the names of all my grandchildren. With those nuggets, they’re off and running. If I’m lucky, all that will happen is that my name and contact information will be sold to every on-line advertiser in the universe. If not, my computer will be held hostage and I’ll be required to pay a ransom. One of my friends got off with a $300 payment. Another wasn’t so lucky. She was held up for $1800.
Mom said nothing comes free except what’s God-given — sunsets, early morning bird conversations, smell of summer rain, stunning hair. I’m pretty sure she’d be skeptical of that DeWalt Power Station. I can only imagine what she might think of penis enhancers.
(Does DeWalt make those?)
