Joe

I met him back in the fall and we went out a few times. We got along great and had some great times but when it came to it, I didn’t pull the trigger. I didn’t commit and let myself flow another way. It didn’t feel “right” or “perfect” or “like it has before.” Should it?

I’m different this time around. My body has changed. My life has changed. My face, my family, my friends. They’re all different.

I’ve gained weight and lost weight. I’ve gotten tattoos and piercings. I’ve picked up scars and nicks. I’ve lost some hair and gained it elsewhere. I’ve graduated, twice. Been laid off, once. Moved three times to three new cities. I’ve done things I have always wanted to do and been to places I’ve only dreamed of. I have also dealt with trials and weathered storms that I never saw coming. I’ve dealt with loss and disappointment, sometimes of my own making. My path has led me to grow and mature; changed my outlook and my attitude.

Why then did I expect love to feel the same? Why was I waiting on something that would smell, taste, and look the same as it did before? Why after 10 years of my life where the only thing constant was change would love appear to me the same way as it had before?

Well it’s different this time; which is perfect.