Jesus Christ Now Goes By JC

He’s millennial AF!

I keep up with the Kardashians all the time. For a change I thought I’ll keep up with the children of an even more twisted family.

Here are excerpts of my conversation with the Christ himself:

The next version of the bible will have the full recipe for Avocado toast

If JC could stop acting like a basic white girl, that would be great.

I’m not going to lie, but Jesus has changed. He is not the same Jesus son of Joseph, son of David, son of Alpheus, son of Rodrigues, son of Vin Diesel, son of Will Smith, son of God-knows-who, anymore.

If he continues like this he might have to die again, this time he’d be dying for his own sins.

God, have mercy on your son at least this time!