The One(TM) is an archaic concept.

Firstly, that’s an enormous amount of expectation to drop on a mostly-stranger. Better to seek a SomeOne(TM), or even several SomeOnes, strictly platonic and with low expectations to start. Given enough commonality of experience, a SomeOne may eventually turn into a Special SomeOne(TM)…

Also, the concept of the One(TM) was not created for 100-year lifespans and rapidly changing circumstances. Our world is increasingly chaotic and volatile. Neuroplasticity is a scientific fact. The notion that humans are consistent, especially over decades, is that much more absurd (really, it always was), and the idea of finding a partner who will change with you over those many decades (instead of growing apart) seems silly.

More useful to think of those others as fellow travelers. That frees up a lot of room for surprising and possibly delightful outcomes. “Friends first” is my practice and it takes about a year of shared experiences for me to consider romance. If that person can’t be my friend, what kind of romantic partnership is that? Then there is the added benefit that when things go to hell in a romantic context (as they VERY often do), the friendship can often rescue the situation — a safety net for when you fall.

That doesn’t foreclose the possibility of (female or other) fuckboys, because the biological itch may need scratching in the meantime.

Admittedly, I am extremely hard-nosed, pragmatic and open-minded when it comes to this sort of thing, but it was learned from much suffering and lots of bad choices (though too often there were no good ones to be had).

May all your journeys end in triumph.