If You Live Off A Man’s Compliments..

I lived for the approval and attention of guys. Mainly because I never really received it. And so, when it happened it made me feel all…warm and validated.

Whenever I would go out with a group of people to the mall or somewhere with other people wandering around, there would always be some boy that would approach a friend and completely ignore my existence. Of course, it made me question myself. I believed that just because a boy wasn’t calling me pretty and trying to get my number, that there was something wrong with me.

I would hear people say how they had so many guys salivating over them. How they had so many options. While I had zero. Zilch. Nada. So, of course it made me feel less than and eventually I started to resent those who were attracting all of the attention.

I began to question myself and seriously asked what did they have that I didn’t. The answer to that is: nothing. Absolutely nothing. I’ve learned that what others have to offer and what I have to offer are two completely different things. That we’re all on different planes and that it’s unfair to even compare myself to them or compare them to me. It was also detrimental and annoying to do so.

Over time, I began to realize and am still realizing that not all attention is good. Because most of the guys “gifting” you with it aren’t even about much to begin with. Most of them just want to use you for a night and then toss you to the side. I’d much rather have no one approaching me than have multiple people approaching me for something as useless as that.

Also, I discovered that there are actually people who like what I have going on enough to see what I’m about.

More importantly, I learned the importance of validating myself. I give myself compliments everyday. I am always taking selfies, because I am super gorgeous. Like, supermodel gorgeous. Not only that, I tell myself that I have a beautiful personality and that when I do start attracting more people into my life, they’ll be on the same level as I am. I hype myself up on a daily basis.

So, it’s safe to say that I got over my obsession for a pack of boys to be drooling over me whenever I stepped foot outside of my house. Chances are, I’ve probably just got done wiping the drool from my own mouth.

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