Everyone’s reality

simonacampli
Aug 25, 2017 · 2 min read
jeremy bishop

This post is a “recommended reading ” for a very good article discussing gender identity in young people (you can read it here). To make it even more important is the perspective of a parent which doesn’t cloud a great wisdom and capacity to see unknown things from an unconventional perspective.

It made me think of the delicate moment when in my profession I’m presented with a new story, sometimes the challenge to avoid jumping to conclusions is greater than everything else.

A reality that may be difficult for someone may seem very simple to an exterior mind or, vice versa, something harsh is actually what that person needs to create the change they want to realize. Or, very simply, is not the matter they want to discuss. Active listening is what is more needed to truly facilitate their journey, understanding their vision and vehiculate their discovery of a better balance.

Of course, I always remain part of the equation as — as from previous articles you might recall — the first principle of human communication is that “it is impossible to not — communicate” and therefore it is impossible to maintain complete objectivity on an experience with someone else, at some level, although professionally, relational. Knowing that my personal view is in the mix and considering that at every step is the key to maintain an honest relationship with the people I am working with.

As the founder of radical constructivism, Heinz von Foerster, taught me, there can be no observation without an observer.

The key part, to me, is being present in understanding and respecting the other person’s view on their reality. I can’t be of help if I’m pulling in a different direction from what they believe it is true. We can discuss the adaptability of their truth and how it is helping them to fulfill their desires and needs and, if realizing it is, by now, standing in their way, work in finding alternative strategies to reach a better, evolved, balance.

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Promoting Best Strategies toward problem solving and well-being. Creative innovation and Sustainability instigator. Have a weakness for miniature things.

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