A Changed Mind For A Changed Life

I have friends and family come to me all the time when they need someone to talk to. Whether they are experiencing a spiraling depression and need to vent, or they need advice on trying to figure out if the person they’re interested in is worth the pursuit — I’m usually their go-to girl.

Every now and then, however, I don’t have an answer for them. As much as I enjoy helping, the bottom line is and will always be that regardless of any advice that’s given, only we can be the one to help our self. Despite being completely aware of this fact, it can be a hard concept for anyone to grasp. Often times, we doubt ourselves so much that we look to others to guide us, even when the answer was within us the entire time. For this reason, it is important that we train ourselves to understand a key point: we have full control over who we are and how we think.

Someone once said, “you can change your life by changing your mind” and I doubt a quote has ever resonated with me any deeper. You see, our brain is a powerful tool. It is so powerful, in fact, that we often give it more control over us than it deserves by allowing negativity to manifest. When we see or hear something negative about ourselves or anything else there is this tendency to automatically hold it to be true. Consider all of the things that are keeping you complacent in life right now. Now, consider how drastically things would change if you just decided right here, at this very moment, to change your mind about them. Sounds crazy doesn’t it? But why? What is it that’s stopping you? I always ask this question when I tell someone to try this and the answer always boils down to one concept — fear.

Whether it’s connected to anxiety, lack of support, or just plain self-doubt, fear is usually the greatest contributor to the list of things that keep us from achieving a lot. It is the main component of the negativity we allow to infest our mind. Because of it, we procrastinate as if tomorrow was actually promised.

During our time on this Earth, we were given one life to live with the expectancy to make the most of it. We have endless possibilities in this world, but limit ourselves out of fear. We are more inclined to mention and think about what we can’t do instead of believing that we actually can. In turn, many of us leave this world with unfulfilled destinies. We spend all our time putting ourselves down and go on to be parents that try to coach our children at a very young age by telling them “you can be anything you want to be”. Okay…so why can’t you?

During my life, I have realized (and am still realizing) that it takes so much more energy to hold onto negativity than it does to release it and allow myself the happiness I deserve. I can sit here all day and list off reasons as to why I’m not good enough to accomplish anything, how bad life has been to me, and why I want something out of life so bad but can’t make it happen, but when I’m done, where would I be? Still sad. Still frustrated. Still stagnant. The fact of the matter is not all of us are born with a silver spoon, and the few of us that are don’t even know how to use it to our benefit. So we can sit here and be mad at the world working menial jobs just to get by, or we can get up and create the life that we want, the life we told ourselves we can’t achieve.

I want you to read this piece and think about anything, big or small, that you have put off doing or straight told yourself you’re incapable of because of a mindset that you may have held onto for years. Whether it’s cleaning up your room or looking into that business you considered starting, just think about it. After you think about it, I want you to do it. I want you to challenge yourself to counter every negative thought, every “what if…”, and every “but I can’t…” or “I don’t wanna…” with a positive one. Write your goals on sticky notes if you must and post them around the house, set them as your wallpaper, do anything you must to keep yourself from being consumed by a negativity that you DON’T have to have. Because you are present on this Earth, you are already a miracle that has manifested. Believe in that, and watch your true life finally begin to unfold before you.