The Wisdom of Stoicism on How to Build Self- Discipline
We are living in a time with constant doubt, fear and uncertainty. How do we find strength in hard times? What is our perspective? Do hard times make us better? What kind of dialogue do you have with yourself? Ask yourself: “What is this situation meant to teach me?”
Tough times make you feel as if your whole world has come to a halt. Life never stops moving and evolving. Time does heal and you will find yourself moving again, but you will need to do it in your own way. Hardships are part of growing.
A crisis can make you better, but only if you have the right mindset. Some lessons can include: to become stronger, learn to let go of the past, communicate more clearly, trust your gut feeling, to forgive and grow. Life is a blessing; do not forget to keep enjoying it. We have little control over most of the external circumstances, but what we do have control over is the way we react. Life is fragile. Spend your time wisely and appreciate life. Life is meant to be lived, deeply felt, and enjoyed. Science is showing that taking on challenges stimulates cell growth in the brain. This helps us cope, and build resilience.
The starting point of any new pursuit is critical. No personal success, achievement, or goal, can be realized without self-discipline. It is singularly the most important attribute needed to achieve any type of personal or professional excellence or outstanding performance. We often learn the hard way that our world is ruled by external factors. No process takes place overnight, just as it takes time to build muscle, so does it take time to develop self-discipline. The more you train and build it, the stronger you become.
Discipline is the fundamental action, mindset and philosophy which keeps human in a routine and making progress towards whatever he or she is pursuing. Philosophy is not just about talking or reading dense books, it is something humans have used throughout history to reach their personal and professional achievements. This wisdom is still there and Stoicism is considered the most practical of all philosophies.
What is Stoicism?
Stoicism was founded in Athens in the early 3rd century BC. The four virtues of Stoicism are wisdom, justice, courage and temperance. The central wisdom is that happiness and judgment should be based on behavior, rather than words. Temperance is subdivided into self-control, discipline and modesty.
Stoicism sets out to remind us of how unpredictable the world can be. How brief our moment of life is. How to be steadfast and strong, and in control of yourself. The source of our dissatisfaction lies in our impulsive dependency on our reflexive senses rather than logic.
The very root of the Stoicism thinking is a very simple: take the obstacles in your life and turn them into your advantage
Stoicism was famously practiced by ancient Stoic philosophers who came from almost every imaginable background. One was a slave, another was emperor. One was a water carrier, another a famous playwright. Some were merchants, others were independently wealthy. Some were Senators and others were soldiers. What they all had in common was the philosophy that they practiced. Whether they were chafing under the shackles of slavery or leading the Roman army, they focused not on the external world but on what was solely in their own control: Their own thoughts, their own actions, their beliefs.
The most influential stoics were Epictetus, Seneca and Marcus Aurelius. Roman Emperor Marcus Aurelius, born nearly two millennia ago is perhaps the best known Stoic leader in history. Marcus Aurelius, the emperor of the Roman Empire, the most powerful man on earth, sat down each day to write himself notes about restraint, compassion and humility. The second most prominent Stoic in history is Seneca who was born in southern Spain over 2 000 years ago and educated in Rome. He was the son of Seneca the Elder, a well regarded Roman writer as well as later in his life uncle to the poet Lucan. Seneca pursued a career in politics and became a high-ranking financial clerk. Seneca, when Nero turned on him and demanded his suicide, could think only of comforting his wife and friends.
Epictetus was born nearly 2 000 years ago in Hierapolis (present-day Pamukkale in Turkey) as a slave in a wealthy household. Epaphroditus, his owner, gave him the permission to pursue liberal studies and it is how Epictetus discovered philosophy through the Stoic Musonius Rufus who became his teacher and mentor. Later, Epictetus obtained his freedom shortly after emperor Nero’s death and started teaching philosophy in Rome for nearly 25 years. Epictetus endured the horrors of slavery to found his own school where he taught many of Rome’s greatest minds.
Stoicism doesn’t concern itself with complicated theories about the world, but with helping us overcome destructive emotions and act on what can be acted upon. The key of Stoicism is an action, not endless debate.
The Stoics were writing honestly, often self-critically, about how they could become better people, be happier and deal with the problems they faced. You can see how practicing misfortune makes you stronger in the face of adversity; how flipping an obstacle upside down turns problems into opportunities, and remembering how small you are keeps your ego manageable and in perspective.
Stoics were all men of action. Marcus Aurelius wrote to himself a simple and effective reminder to help him regain perspective and stay balanced: “Run down the list of those who felt intense anger at something: the most famous, the most unfortunate, the most hated, the most whatever: Where is all that now? Smoke, dust, legend or not even a legend. Think of all the examples and how trivial the things we want so passionately are.”
Luckily, we still have access to these ideas, despite the fact that many of the greatest Stoics never wrote anything down for publication. ‘’Meditations’’ is the only document with the private thoughts of the world’s most powerful man — Marcus Aurelius- giving advice to himself on how to make good on the responsibilities and obligations of his positions. Trained in Stoic philosophy, Marcus Aurelius, stopped almost every night to practice a series of spiritual exercises: reminders designed to make him humble, patient, empathetic, generous, and strong in the face of whatever he was dealing with.
Stoicism has been practiced by kings, presidents, artists, writers, entrepreneurs and many others. Both historical and modern men illustrate Stoicism as a way of life.
George Washington was introduced to Stoicism by his neighbors at age seventeen, and afterwards, put on a play about Cato to inspire his men in that dark winter at Valley Forge. Thomas Jefferson had a copy of Seneca on his nightstand when he died. The economist Adam Smith’s theories on the inter connectedness of the world — capitalism — were significantly influenced by the Stoicism that he studied as a schoolboy, under a teacher who had translated Marcus Aurelius’ works. The political thinker, John Stuart Mill, wrote of Marcus Aurelius and Stoicism in his famous treatise ‘’On Liberty’’, calling it “the highest ethical product of the ancient mind.” Theodore Roosevelt, after his presidency, spent eight months exploring the unknown jungles of the Amazon, and of the eight books he brought on the journey, two were Marcus Aurelius’ ‘’Meditations’’ and Epictetus’ ‘’Enchiridion’’.
How to Build Self Discipline?
Most often our ego runs away from anything that reminds us of the reality that sits at odds with the comfortable narrative we have build for ourselves. The starting point of any new pursuit is critical. Stoicism is no difference. Stoicism is a tool that we can use to become better in our craft, better friends and better people. No personal success, achievement or goal, can be realized without self-discipline. It is singularly the most important attribute needed to achieve any type of personal or professional excellence or outstanding performance. We often learn the hard way that our world is ruled by external factors. No process takes place overnight, just as it takes time to build muscle, so does it take time to develop self-discipline. The more you train and build it, the stronger you become.
Self-discipline is an essential element of Stoic philosophy. Stoicism is about self-discipline, not authoritarianism. The Stoics remind us that we have no idea what other people are struggling with and we have no idea what their inner life is like. If we did, we would not judge them.
What we can learn from writings of Marcus Aurelius on how to build self discipline?
Marcus Aurelius held one of — if not the most — powerful positions in the world at the time and if he chose to, nothing would be off limits. Marcus Aurelius practiced Stoicism and he was devoted student of philosophy of Stoicism. During his rule, Aurelius found the time construct a series of autobiographical writings, now known as the ‘’Meditations’’, and in these writings offered a number of key insights on how to build self discipline.
10 Important Stoicism Insights for Self-Discipline from Marcus Aurelius
1. Self Discipline Starts with Finding Your Purpose
Marcus Aurelius says: ‘’I have to go to work — as a human being. What do I have to complain of, if I’m going to do what I was born for- the things I was brought into the world to do? Or is this what I was created for? Marcus Aurelius believed that we all have a purpose; something that we were created for. It is our duty to carry out that purpose because it is purpose that gets you out of the bed each morning. If you have a clear understanding of your goals and how your tasks fit within them, you are much more likely to complete those goals. The biggest source of self discipline is to have a reason to do the task. If you don’t know what to do, just start. If you want to be a writer, write every day. Anything you want to do, you don’t need any motivation or advise. Just start practicing something you are interested in and tackle every day as it comes because it is your purpose that will give you an internal desire, drive and motivation to propel you forward towards your goal. Self discipline is about finding compelling reasons to do something then committing yourself to see that task or activity through to the very end.
2. Count on Yourself
According to Marcus Aurelius, you should ‘’Turn your desire into stone. Quench your appetites. Keep your mind centered on itself‘’. After you have a solid purpose, it is time to build a practical plan of action to help you accomplish your goal. You shouldn’t just to commit to your goals but commit to all the little actions you will take along the way in the pursuit of those goals. We must be fully committed doing whatever it takes to get the job done not matter what challenges get in the way.
Self discipline is the ability to get yourself to take an action — to do what you need to do- regardless your physical, mental or emotional state. Everything you want in your life — everything you want to have, be and do depends on your ability to get yourself to take the necessary actions to achieve your goals, whether you feel like it or not. You can start with forming an effective plan of action for accomplishing your goal. It must be built on the foundation of mini milestones that break your goal down into manageable chunks. Mini milestones will ensure that you are working towards your desired outcome in small pieces and time blocks. This tactic gives you a sense of control over the tasks and projects you are working on. What you are ultimately trying to avoid is succumbing to being overwhelmed. Overwhelming can quickly digress to procrastination and procrastination can subsequently lead to stagnation and where there is stagnation, self discipline can’t exist.
3. Show Up Every Day
Marcus Aurelius says: ‘’ You must build up your life action by action and be content if each one achieves its goal as far as possible and no one can keep you from this’’. Even after a solid purpose and a practical plan, almost 95% of us fail to achieve our goals. We fail because we fail to be consistent. We need to show up, every day, and put in the work. The simple act of showing up and immersing yourself in your craft does wonders for mental endurance. You build focus and come to terms with the arduous process that it takes to achieve anything great. You have to put in countless hours of work before you reap any of the benefits. Self Discipline is nothing more but the habit of consistency. Finding the motivation to do something again and again until you start seeing results. Even if you fail or don’t succeed, if you didn’t exercise, it doesn’t define your character. Your ability to keep going is what moulds you into a disciplined and strong person. A bad day doesn’t have to become a bad week, a bad week doesn’t have to become a bad year. The moment you wake up, remember, that the new day is a new life and move forward by opening your eyes and focusing on what is in front of you, which is life itself.
4. Practice Voluntary Hardship
In the words of Marcus Aurelius: ‘’We should discipline ourselves in small things, and from these progress to things of greater value‘’. Voluntary hardship is one of the ways we can build our self discipline. It means constant testing ourselves and by making life routinely uncomfortable in some way, we are hardening ourselves for the day we might need live it for real. A voluntary hardship might be a having cold shower or not smoking etc. and you will begin to understand what scarcity and hardship feel like and that you can live with both if needed.
5. Practice Dichotomy of Control
Marcus Aurelius says: ‘’You have power over your mind — not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength’’. Being distressed, being bothered by small things instantly is terrible for discipline. You have a goal, you are working and then thoughts and distress about something external, meaning it is out of your control, de-rails you. The best thing you can do in these circumstances is to apply Epictetus’ dichotomy of control. Reinforce to yourself what is within your control and what is out of your control. If you embrace what is out of your control and accept it, you will experience tranquility.
6. Never Play the Victim
In the words of Marcus Aurelius: ‘’Do your job without whining.’’ Have you said any of these ? I was just born this way. I never learned anything different. My parents set a terrible example. Everyone else does it. Excuses that people use to justify staying as they are instead of striving to become better. You need to assume responsibility. The ‘’why me?’’ mentality is an enemy to mental toughness. You might not be at fault, but your life depends on what determining what is within your control and taking those things into your own hands. You must train yourself to frame these things this way instead of immediately resorting to self pity. It is certainly easier to pawn off blame on others when something goes wrong. But only those with a degree of mental fortitude are able to step up even when it is not their fault and right the ship. Be that person who steps in to take an action, not the one who looks the other way and casts blame. When you victimize yourself or your current position, you relinquish control and absolve yourself of personal responsibility. Without a sense of ownership, meaningful progress becomes an impossible task.
7. Practice Delayed Gratification
In the words of Marcus Aurelius: ‘’ So you were born to feel nice? Instead of doing things and experiencing them? Don’t you see the plants, the birds, the ants and spiders and bees going about their individual tasks putting the world in order, as best they can? And you are not willing to do your job as human being? Why aren’t you running to do what nature demands? Delayed gratification involves the ability to wait to get what you want. This ability to resist temptation and stick to your goals is often referred to as self discipline, and delayed gratification is often seen as a central part of this behavior. We put off what we want now so that we can get something else, something better later on.
8. Ignore Naysayers
Marcus Aurelius says: ‘’ When another blames you or hates you, or people voice similar criticisms, go to their souls, penetrate inside and see what sort of people they are. You will realize that there is no need to be racked with anxiety that they should hold any particular opinion about you’’. Whenever you step out of norm and declare that you believe that you have a special purpose in life and that you are going to do whatever it takes to achieve it, you will attract naysayers. Naysayers are the people who criticize, object to, or oppose something. The naysayers just love to say nay. They might love you, but they are afraid of progress so they are against everything and their opinions are just terrible for your self discipline. You need to realize that allowing yourself to be upset by the opinion of someone you don’t know or don’t respect is as foolish as getting upset about the weather. It Is a waste of energy. Their voice doesn’t deserve to be heard. Don’t hand over your peace of mind to outsiders to disrupt as they please. You should actively seek honest feedback from those you respect. If someone has a history of being a naysayer, ignore them.
9. Find Wise People to Emulate
Marcus Aurelius says: ‘’It will even do to socialize with men of good character in order to model your life on theirs, whether you choose someone living or someone from the past. ‘’ It is time now to look outwards to answers to help strengthen your self discipline. Let’s identify role models. Your role models could be your friends, family etc. who already achieved the goal you are working towards. Ask yourself: Who is doing this right now? Who has successfully achieved this goal? Who has successfully mastered this habit? Who has successful made this change? Who has the necessary self discipline in this area? What can I learn from this person? Take time to ask these people how they disciplined themselves. Then use their experience to help you to discipline yourself along your own personal journey.
10. Honestly Review Your Day
In the words of Marcus Aurelius: ‘’These are the characteristics of the rational soul. Self awareness, self examination, self determination. It succeeds in its own purpose.’’ One of the best ways to become more disciplined is to scrutinize yourself and find your weak spots. Be brutally honest and use this time to connect with your subconscious. Practicing evening retrospections on a consistent basis will allow you become more self aware through every step of your day because you will be actively gathering information to formulate and articulate constructive answers to these questions. Ask yourself : ‘’What did I do well today?’’ ‘’Where were my discipline and self control tested?’’ ‘’ What did I do bad?’’ ‘’Why did this occur?’’ ‘’How can I improve?’’ Now you know how you can improve tomorrow, but don’t beat yourself up. Be like Seneca, and forgive yourself and have self compassion. Research shows that it is forgiving yourself — not beating yourself up- that prevents you from continuing put things off. Don’t be critical of yourself. Think about what you did well and you can repeat it tomorrow. Be grateful for the good that happened today.
The single most important practice in Stoic philosophy is differentiating between what we can change and what we can’t. What we have influence over and what we do not. For example, a flight is delayed because of weather or no amount of wishing will make you taller or shorter or born in a different country. No matter how hard you try, you can’t make someone like you. And on top of that, time spent hurling yourself at these immovable objects is time not spent on the things we can change.
“Choose not to be harmed and you won’t feel harmed. Don’t feel harmed and you haven’t been.” -Marcus Aurelius
Stoicism, as Marcus Aurelius reminds himself, is not some grand Instructor but a balm, a soothing ointment to an injury wherever we might have one. Epictetus was right when he said that “life is hard, brutal, punishing, narrow, and confining, a deadly business.” We should take whatever help we can get, and it just happens that help can come from ourselves.
Self discipline begins with the mastery of our thoughts. If you don’t control what you think, you can not control what you do. Motivation gets you going, discipline keeps you growing. This is why we can’t let externals determine whether something was worth it or not. The key to success lies within us.
