Be…Friends!

Cathy chérie,

It feels like Summer has begun! Well, here in France anyways…

Because the forecast for the beginning of this week had predicted summer temperatures, I had set the intention to make progress on our business plan over the weekend. I call this “discipline”, because that word carries the word “disciple”, which comes down to following my own words, following my own advice.

However.

On Saturday a haircut-at-home, with my friend and her two sons, turned into a visit to the beach, which turned into buying-and-sharing ice cream in the sun, which turned into returning home all rosy and smiley in the evening. On Sunday morning I had been invited for a walk in the mountains (Pyrenees), which turned into a long lunch beforehand, and a walk that lasted almost until sunset.

When I “confessed” all this to you, you just said “But this is part of the flow!” And, of course, I agree.

You see, above all disciplinary deals I make with myself, there’s one that always gets priority: does it flow? Does it feel like play? Does it feel light? Does it make me smile? Or can I at least befriend it?

The way Eckhart Tolle describes this, is the befriending of the present moment. You know I love quotes, and this one is hang-above-my-bed-material. From his book A New Earth:

“Do I want the present moment to be my friend or my enemy? The present moment is inseparable from life, so you are really deciding what kind of relationship you want to have with life. Once you have decided you want the present moment to be your friend, it is up to you to make the first move: Become friendly toward it, welcome it no matter in what disguise it comes, and soon you will see the results. Life becomes friendly toward you; people become helpful, circumstances cooperative. One decision changes your entire reality. But that one decision you have to make again and again and again — until it becomes natural to live in such a way.”

Does this bring me non-stop flow, and turn me into an enlightened guru? Of course not! That is to say, it might one day, but for now it just gets me out of too much negative thinking quicker.

For example.

As I was lying on the beach yesterday, I noticed I wasn’t happy. I felt frustrated, and I didn’t even know why, which frustrated me even more! Remembering the above quote, though, I decided to let the frustration be for what it was. So I was lying on a perfect beach, in perfect weather, with nothing to worry about, and still feeling frustrated. So what.

After about an hour, all of a sudden, it felt like the clouds in my head cleared. I felt happy for no reason at all! There wasn’t a thought attached to the feeling, it just came over me, and I smiled from ear to ear. That lasted for about 30 seconds, and then the frustration took over again. But it wasn’t as heavy as before, because that brief moment had shown me that I can still be friends with life, with myself, even in the midst of frustration.

While letting my mind run off on this last bit, it comes back to me with a new idea: how about we talk to people about befriending their current situation? It doesn’t mean they have to be happy with it. But if you want to change anything, wouldn’t it work better to be friends with where you are? To take your situation by the hand, and together look for something better?

With love-from-where-I-am,

Pauline

Hey Sister, are you curious about us? We are Cathy Kwanten & Pauline Siebers, and you can contact us at sistermeetsister@gmail.com