San Francisco rain makes the world grind to a stop. Commute times triple. Commuters are more selfish (the Christmas spirit never really takes hold in places where it doesn’t get below 50 in December). And for some reason the buses begin to randomly refuse to pick up passengers.

No one likes taking the bus even in the nicest weather, but when it’s too wet outside to ride and Lyft line is surging to $23, you’re not really left with any other option.

It’s a pretty popular commute and there are any number of lines that will take you downtown. The “rain” is really nothing more than mist, and it’s warm enough standing at the bus stop that you don’t need gloves. Could be worse. In pretty much any other part of the country you'd be freezing your ass off this time of year.

The first bus pulls up and opens its doors with that creaky hiss. Two passengers get off. Onboarding passengers should step aside as common decency dictates and wait for them to clear, but before you can step on board the doors close.

You look up in protest but the driver just raises his hand in the “halt” signal like he’s Superman stopping a bus. Guess you’re not boarding. Now the mist feels a little more like rain.

A pretty girl wearing a fashionable raincoat joins you as a second bus approaches.

Be careful. you say to her, these aren’t the type of buses that necessarily pick up passengers.

She ignores you. Maybe because she has headphones in. Maybe because she doesn’t talk to creeps in the rain. It’s hard to tell because she’s got her fashionable coat’s hood over her head.

This bus doesn’t even pull over to the curb to drop off passengers, but that doesn’t phase our HBIC. She holds her hand up like she’s hailing a cab, with all the confidence of a woman who’s used to getting what she wants.

And sheepishly, the bus genuflects in her direction, not even bothering to pull all the way over. Open Sesame.

Pretty girls can literally stop traffic

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