“Most people with troubled relationships don’t actually want to get close to the person.” David D Burns MD

“Now imagine there’s a magic dial right in front of you. If you press this magic dial, that person you deeply resent will become your best friend in the world.

“With 200 people in the audience, maybe 3 or 4 hands will go up. I say to the audience ‘I just gave you the choice between a loving, joyful, fulfilling relationship and a hostile abusive one. And which one did you choose? The hostile one.’

“Most people with troubled relationships don’t actually want to get close to the person. They’re just there to tell you what a loser their sister, their neighbor is, or their husband or their wife.”

David D Burns MD

Source: 004: A = Agenda Setting (Part 1) — The Eight Most Common Forms of Therapeutic Resistance — Feeling Good

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