What is Trust?
I have experienced first hand how difficult it can be to put your trust into somebody. Especially, when so many others before have broken that very trust time after time again. I know nobody is perfect and that we all make mistakes but a line has to be drawn at somewhere, right? A line separating the forgiveness of mistakes from being taken advantage of. It can be exhausting trying to decipher the between the two, I know.
There has to be some sort of change or what’s the point. I know I have been known for being gullible or naive and I’m not denying it, it’s true I cannot help but choose to see the best in everyone; I know that I can become blinded by this as well. I give to many chances to too many people who probably didn’t even deserve one in the first place. How else are you supposed to know if you can trust someone if you don’t give them a chance to be trusted?
“The best way to find out if you can trust somebody is to trust them.”
Do not mistake that as though I am easily taken advantage because I know when to put my foot down, it is just a matter of when or better yet who.
I feel as though people are looked down on for being venerable, but in reality it can be one of our greatest strengths. Venerability gives us a better sense of self-awareness, yet we try and build these walls up to protect ourselves,keep others out. By doing this we end up missing out on so much.
These fears are normal, everyone has them. The fear of betrayal, the fear of rejection. I have felt this way myself, but I’m trying to rise above them. I’ve made my mistakes, now I have to just learn from them, forgive and move on.
So many times I have thought that by forgiving I could just give my trust back, but thats not how it works. Trust cannot just be given back, and maybe someone who thinks they a right to your trust did not deserve it in the first place. Once trust is severed it cannot just be reattached, it takes time to earn back. But like I said I can become blinded and not realize that even though I have forgiven I still need to move on.
There is so much that goes into trusting a person. Trust is both an emotional and logical act. Where emotionally, you expose your vulnerabilities to a person, but believing they will not take advantage of your openness. Logically, it is where you assessed the possibilities of gain and loss; only to conclude that the person in question will behave in a predictable manner.
I hate to tell you this, but you can’t predict everything. There is no possible way of knowing that if you put your trust into a person that they will break such trust. That is why you have to just let go of your fears and let your guard down. This way, yes, you will have you broken and maybe even your heart broken, maybe even more than once.
However, I can tell you this, once you get the courage to look the big, bad fears in the eye, you will discover it was worth it. I have put my trust into some nasty people. People who have let me down. People who have made me question trying to trust others. I’ve trusted and I’ve fallen and it is an never ending cycle at times. The good news is that it doesn’t last forever.
You will find people that you can trust and you will finally know that you can trust them because you will they will have the qualities that you found the others were lacking. You will feel genuine trust, companionship, friendship, love, agreement, relaxation, comfort. You don’t have to believe me, this is something that I had to learn for myself, the hard way.
Just have faith.