From some of what you’ve written, here and in a piece about a ferry ride to Seattle (I think), it seems like you’re energized by contact with others. They say that’s a primary difference between extraverts … who are energized by contact … and introverts … who are depleted by contact and need solitude to recharge.
If this doesn’t ring true, ignore it, please.
But you speak about getting back into tour-directing. It sounds like you want to do it. I don’t know what’s stopping you. You don’t need to tell me, of course. But your yearning comes through in your writing.
I hope you find the right way for you.