Observations in Transit

Part 1

1. Middle aged men are fully capable of playing solitaire for the entire duration of a

flight from SLC — -> PDX

2. People really love their Nooks. I can’t even look at them, the people and the nooks. I

prefer the tangible.

3. Sometimes women in their 60’s, make more noise than a small army of children.

4. I am good at guessing relative age.

5. Not all young American kids that can speak French, are cool.

5a. In fact, it might be just the opposite

5b. Their moms might suck too

6. Boyshorts can cause a scene when trying to get through security, Thanks Victoria,

definitely not a secret now. Bitch.

7. Ginger ale always tastes better in the sky, 100% of the time, just ask me.

8. The man in 12D is beautiful. In a quiet way, I wish I knew his name.

9. I sure do cry a lot

10. I am good at lists. (kind of)

11. I lied, nearly the entire duration.

12. Sometimes middle aged men stop playing games to flip through their photos just

long enough for me to see the white and wild wolves. 12D who? I want to know THIS

guy’s name.

13. I have really been doing myself a disservice by not writing, and frankly, I am upset.

Part 2

1. You can, in fact, feel yourself actually getting sick mid flight.

2. Running like a mad woman through the airport is kind of fun, kind of.

3. My shoes are loud.

4. Sometimes when you are so scared you will miss your flight, you don’t pay attention to

the terminals and you just run. And run. Only to realize that you passed your terminal

long ago and have to run past the same people you just ran by moments ago.

5. People will laugh, but their faces blur, so who cares.

6. Alaskan Airlines will make you pay for all your bags, but they will open the plane

back up for you if you are desperate and dripping in sweat.

7. My gym membership has really come in handy.

8. People will clap and celebrate your arrival if you make it on said plane.

9. Some flight attendants are more than happy to find storage for your suitcase, when

there is no room in the overhead compartments.

10. But probably only because you swore when your arms wouldn’t work.

11. Even Mormons laugh when you cuss at yourself. That’s cussin right.

12. Some women will despise you when you steal back the window seat and also smell

like a Jr. high locker room, not a good combo.

13. Sometimes going back to the place you live, doesn’t feel like going home at all.

14. I have the greatest best friend in the whole world, and turning 30 ain’t so bad.

15. But never trust said friend again, when she says you don’t need to go to the airport

extra early, you will feel better even if you have to sit and wait and write lists