I was never talkative person or a person who can easily vent out the feelings or who can express the things just like that.
In my school I use to get many opportunity in sports, dance and other activities but I always took back seat , I always performed mediocre,I see girls dancing, bragging their talents but it wasn’t them who made me feel less because deep inside me I knew that I am capable of doing all this, but there was something which kept me seized which did the most harm.
Things ,ideas, thoughts kept piling up unimplemented, unexecuted unexpressed and it made my mind confused which can’t easily take a decision.
I was obedient , well mannered girl I always hesitated doing new things visiting new places meeting new people, Inferiority complex started taking shape I never tried to show my self up, I was always be like happy to be a average girl who can easily hide herself.
Amidst of all one thing that always did good for me was an education, i was good at studies & my well educated parents always supported us in that, i can say that i grew up in the luxury of books.
An unwanted fear was there i don’t know how my mind got conditioned like that because me and my brother got equal opportunity to grow and he is not like this.
Slowly and gradually I started rejecting and underestimating myself for life’s beautiful moments.
My throat is choking up by writing this as how unfair I played it to my self, i wasted many years of life in an unknown fear, embarrassment and self rejection.
At the same i am happy now that i have faith to overcome it and i am writing it down to convince myself that all those fear lies at my foot and i can Kick them out.
Here i want people like me to understand that its normal to inculcate habits sometime good sometime bad, feeling of inferiority is one in the bad.Every body is not born alike some people are vocal from the very start other have to put effort,some people can express themselves in no time, for some other it can take much more, just understand this life can throw challenges in any form do not get defeated , embrace your life like your life share yourself with it.It will surely embrace you back.
With time i have changed a lot, but still the tint of it is not faded yet and i really can relate with people who feel inferior out of no reason indeed.
5 points to get rid of this…..
- Do analysis: Analyse the cause of it, work towards it and if it cant be changed (something natural) let it be and move on.
- Don’t make assumptions, don’t overthink.
- Take a stand to stand out, never think of others.
- Don’t seek for approvals: do it your way, may be wrong but one day you will start taking rights ones, or may be thing done in your way comes out to be best way
- Talk and express yourself ,to an individual to a group to a stranger to a well known :)
Some tricks which works for me actually :)
- Start singing or humming : Many a time when i enter washroom or a lift when i feel discomfort and feeling of lesser starts creeping over me i start humming a song which really boosts me up and put me on the front foot.
- Start putting expression: In your narration or talks ,forcefully start adding acts and expression (proper hand movements, open gestures, emoting face etc)if it doesn’t comes naturally, when talking to a person/group to whom you think you are feeling less.
- Mock yourself: Start mocking yourself make others laugh at your shortcoming instead of hiding them.But you keep remember that why you doing this, don’t let it adversely affect you.