Self-Developments I am thankful for in 2018
This year, a lot changed in my life.
I moved out of home, I finally started dating someone new (even if only for a few months), I moved countries, I ended up with a minor but permanent disability, I moved countries again, some of my relationships took on a new dimension, I learned a lot more than I ever knew before and most importantly I feel a lot more in control and have a greater sense of perspective than I did before.
2018 was really a year of noticeable self-development and growing up for me. I won’t say that it has been the happiest year of my life or even the most fulfilling. Just that a lot about me has changed in ways that I am thankful for. Here’s some bullet-point reflections on things that have changed since last year for me:
- I’ve realized that its okay and sometimes beneficial to let other people fail.
- Sometimes failure, whether it be someone else’s, or your own, is nowhere near as bad as you think it will be.
- You can choose your level of heartbreak when something doesn’t work out.
- You can be friends with people you loved, or once loved.
- There is nothing wrong with just feeling love for someone even if a future with them will never work out.
- There is nothing wrong with just expressing love for someone even if you both know a future together will never work out.
- Touch is a normal form of human interaction and not something to be afraid of.
- Things that other people say are dealbreakers often aren’t if you have the maturity to think differently about them (think: non-monogamy, disability, etc).
- The only person who I am truly accountable to is myself; if I wanted to, I could quit my studies, my job or any of my other commitments and still find a path for myself (not that I would; I like the path that I’m on a the moment).
- People invite me to things because they enjoy my company, just like I invite them to things because I enjoy their company.
- You can make other people feel valued by inviting them to be in your presence without expectation.
- I have years of experience with lots of different things now that give me value because there are simply things that I’ve learnt that other people haven’t (because they’ve been learning other things that I don’t know!).
- I don’t truly hate anybody and I don’t think anybody truly hates me. I don’t have the time and neither does anybody else.
- Sometimes people will make me upset and sometimes I’ll make other people upset. They forgive and forget in the same way that I do, because there’s really no point to holding grudges.
- Rejection almost always happens not because of who you are, but because of how other people decide to see you.
- Acting stupidly and generating controversy is how you become memorable in the same way as all the other memorable people.
- You can choose to work on your faults or just accept them for what they are. As long as those faults aren’t unnecessarily hurting other people, there’s nothing wrong with just letting them be and owning them.
- It is always worth listening to others even if it makes you feel uncomfortable about yourself and who you are.
- Nobody can ever truly know everything ; knowledge always begets more questions than answers, but more knowledge is always useful to have.
- True mastery takes a lifetime and doesn’t happen in your twenties.
That’s all for me, this year. And maybe, if you are feeling inspired, you can share something about how you have changed this year.