Cyberbullying: Cyberbullying is like the usual playground bullying, but it’s done either online or with the cell phones. It can take the form of individual harassment or public humiliation or both. The viral nature of online life involves sending humiliating or degrading messages, pictures, or videos. Sometimes they can even pretend to be the victims, posting comments that look like the victims had written them. Other times, the cyberbullying can take the form of direct threats, including physical ones or social ones.
Why should we care?
Because it’s going to happen to your kids, and it’s going to damage their emotional feelings. Their self-esteem and self-confidence, not to mention their sense of physical safety, all take huge hits when bullying is involved. And you should know that your kids may not want to tell you that they’re being bullied. They might be embarrassed or might not want to open up to the fact they’re on sites they aren’t supposed to be on.
Facts to know
- 1 in every 3 kids says they’ve been cyberbullied.
- Cyberbully reports that 40% of kids say their cyberbullying took place on instant messenger services, 30% report that it happened on social networking sites, and 29% said they were bullied while playing an online game.
- Reports say that girls generally mock others for their physical appearance, while boys tend to make more sexually explicit comments.
- Cyberbullying is especially prevalent in the middle school-aged kids (9–14).
Practical steps to reduce the child’s risk
Naturally, parents want to protect their children and may wonder what they could do to prevent cyberbullying. Fortunately, research suggests some practical steps that can be taken by the parents to reduce their child’s risk:
Accept your child’s online life
Many people clearly distinguish between their online and offline lives, but young people rarely make such distinctions, mostly their offline and online lives are one and the same. Young people increasingly socialize online because today’s parents restrict their ability to socialize offline much more than in the past period. Teens still want to spend time with their friends, but because they are often not allowed to hang out at the mall or the movies, their end up socializing online. Given the importance of technology, well-meaning suggestions like “Nobody cares what you had for breakfast” or “Just delete your account” are likely to be met with an exaggerated eye roll. If a child has been cyberbullied, taking away their access to technology may further victimize them and reduce their likelihood of telling parents about future incidents.
Set rules for online interaction
Accepting technology does not mean ignoring it. About one in eight parents do not set any rules about what their children do online or allowed to do online. Yet setting rules about when children can go online, and what they can and cannot do, is one of the simplest and most effective ways to prevent cyberbullying. Children are also less likely to cyberbully others when they believe that their parents are likely to punish them for such behavior.
Teach respect and responsibility online
Parents should teach their kids as how to behave online, just as they teach them how to use manners and be respectful offline. On the internet, this is called “netiquette,” and it reduces young people’s involvement in cyberbullying. Behaving responsibly online is a skill that needs to be taught to every child. A popular analogy compares society’s approaches to introducing young people to two powerful machines: Vehicles and Internet. Before the teenagers are allowed to drive, they have to follow a series of graduated steps that includes a great deal of learning and practice under supervision. And yet, when children begin using technology, we often tell them to “be smart” and hope for the best out of it.
It can be difficult for many parents to keep up with trends in the growing technology, popular apps, and social networking sites come and go quickly. Rather seeing this as an obstacle, parents can embrace these innovations as an opportunity for their children to teach them about their favorite apps and websites. By this parents can learn what their children are doing, while offering a non-threatening opportunity to ensure that their children know all of their Instagram followers or Snapchat friends and that they are not publicly sharing any personal details.
Monitor online activities
It is important that parents monitor their child’s online activities just like they monitor their offline activities. Parents are accustomed to asking their children as where they are going, who they will be with, and what time they will be home. Fewer ask such type of questions online: What websites are you visiting? Who are you talking to? What are you doing online? Studies have found that this type of parental mediation greatly reduces children’s likelihood of being cyberbullied. Making best use of built-in parental controls and safety features may also be helpful. Snapalert is one such online tool that helps parents in identifying their child’s activities and ensures the safety of the kids.
As technology becomes more portable, best practices like keeping computers in high traffic areas of the home become comparatively difficult. As a result, active parental monitoring is increasingly important. Parents’ efforts should be tailored depending on their child’s age and maturity. And, despite the parent’s best intentions, their child may still experience cyberbullying. If this happens, parents should listen to their children, take their concerns seriously and seek help from others whenever necessary. Give your child all the support they need and keep reminding them that bullies never speak the truth.
If your child notices someone else being picked on, encourage him to support the bullied victim. Many social websites, such as YouTube and Facebook, allows the users to report such abuse. And bullies often back down when others make it very clear they won’t tolerate rude or nasty behavior. Cyberbullying may be the most common online danger these days, but as a parent, talking openly about the issue is the best way to give your child the tools to protect herself from virtual sticks and stones.
