First published in 1943, She Came to Stay (French: L’Invitee) is often described as an act of revenge against the woman who nearly destroyed the author’s relationship (and life) with the celebrated French existentialist philosopher, Jean-Paul Sartre. De Beauvoir herself claimed that writing this book helped her “deal with” the trauma of Sartre’s affair with Olga Kosakiewics (and later with her sister Wanda Kosakiewics).
The subject matter of She Came to Stay seems somewhat odd for a prominent feminist like de Beauvoir. Set in Paris in the eve and during World War II, the story revolves around a woman suffering an existential crisis caused by the introduction of another woman to form what becomes a rather bizarre ménage à trois. The novel explores themes of freedom, dependence, sexuality, and “the other”. The story incorporates elements of existentialism,too.
“The unfortunate episode of the trio did much more than supply me with a subject for a novel; it enabled me to deal with it.’ — The Prime of Life, Simone de Beauvoir”
Françoise — quite obviously a representation of de Beauvoir herself — is a theatre and fiction writer living in Paris who enjoys an open relationship with actor and director Pierre — a thinly veiled Sartre.
Whilst Pierre enjoys numerous affairs with other women, Françoise remains content with the knowledge that he cares for none of them so much as he cares for her. Their relationship is not one of contrived romance or epic declarations, but of simplicity, comfort and fondness. Similar to de Beauvoir and Sartre’s, freedom and openness is prized above all else.
Françoise’s relationship with Pierre becomes strained when they form a love triangle with Xaviere, largely due to Pierre’s attraction to her. Yet the relationship between the two women is much more ambiguous. Unlike his other affairs, Pierre ingratiates Xaviere into his life with Françoise and allows her to eventually take over. They carry their tempestuous love affair whilst making Françoise totally complicit in every single detail.
Xaviere — a mash-up of sisters Olga and Wanda Kosakiewicz — is introduced as a tempestuous and frankly irritating young woman and protégée of Françoise. Sullen, impulsive, sensual, self-obsessed — Xaviere has a rather hedonistic moral compas and no redeeming features about her whatsoever. She is nothing but manipulative, unpredictable, and capricious.
Xaviere goes above and beyond to drive a wedge between Francoise and Pierre. Due to her jealousy of Françoise’s long-term relationship with Pierre, their ménage à trois eventually falls apart after the initial stage of bliss.
Françoise undergoes something of a breakdown when she fears she has lost Pierre’s affection, and de Beauvoir’s sense of abandonment and betrayal is tangible as she sinks further and further into despair. As a firm feminist, the admission of depression brought on by the loss of a man might be seen as a brave thing, but it must be said, a wholly understandable one.
In addition to the trials and tribulations of love and complex relationships, the story incorporates elements of existentialism, the philosophy embraced by de Beauvoir and Sartre. It’s all about finding the self and the meaning of life through exploring the bounds of free will and personal responsibility.
She Came to Stay is probably the most original existential novel, rivaling Sartre’s Nausea. The novel is largely imbued with Françoise’s existentialist viewpoints and her attempting to discover who she is and her place within the world once everything and everyone in her life have been stripped away.
Unlike her partner, who does it consistently, Françoise does not want to play the field — she and Pierre are one, indivisible from each other, united by love and work.
“Pierre was on the stage, she was in the audience, and yet for both of them it was the same play being performed in the same theatre. Their life was the same.’’
However, it is obvious to the reader, if not to Françoise, that she is always second to him, not equal. Pierre’s work dominates their lives, whilst her novel is only worked on when he doesn’t need her at the theatre; she places his work and desire for other women above her own wishes.
De Beauvoir, too, always has placed herself as less important than Sartre. She, like the Sex she later wrote about, was always second. Critics often saw de Beauvoir as one of the mothers of feminism on paper but a traitor in her life. Could she only write the theory, not live it? Or, as She Came to Stay suggests, did the mere fact of having a choice matter more than what she chose?
In the end, Francoise finishes off Xaviere to reclaim her own power, and to prove she comes second to no one.She recognizes the need to act alone, to take responsibility for what she wants by murdering her opponent.
“Her act was her very own … She had at last made a choice. She had chosen herself.”
Similarly de Beauvoir, by finishing her first novel She Came to Stay, she finished off any notion of herself as second to her philosopher partner. She chooses to be a writer independent of her relationship with Sartre.
“Before writing She Came to Stay I spent years fumbling around for a subject. From the moment I began that book I never stopped writing’”— Simone de Beauvoir, The Prime of Life
In conclusion, the main purpose of this novel is not revenge, but catharsis. De Beauvoir examines the feelings that Sartre’s relationship with Olga (and later with Wanda) evoked in her from a philosophical perspective, not the perspective of a woman scorned. She explores why she feels the way she does with the reader.
De Beauvoir writes so eloquently about human nature that it hits so close to the heart with all those feelings and thoughts one would prefer to bury deep within ourselves. Her lines are dramatic, though never overwrought; her characters breathe and talk as in life they must.
