When a Glance Saves Your Day
In the last couple of months I have been writing my MA dissertation. Those six months were among the most difficult of my short existence psychologically speaking. I have to precise that it was not so much because of the inherent difficulties of the lengthy research and writing process — in the end those are quite easily manageable — but because of the awfully dark and pessimistic thoughts that were starting to invade my mind as I was coming closer to the end of my studies. I honestly would never have imagined that the transition from being a candid student to the position of job seeker (adult ?) could be so brutal and frightening. What if this field that I chose was not the good one after all, despite the good marks and the pleasure I had in studying the history and business of art ? Wasn’t I too much influenced by my friends who encouraged me to join this MA after my tedious years at law school ?
Those dark thoughts which have been gaining a more and important place in my mind — “I’m gonna end up with a shitty job”, “I’m incapable of doing anything worthwhile” — are certainly accentuated by the media and all the depressing news regarding the economic crisis, the high unemployment rates and a new and bigger financial crisis predicted by some highly paid experts who were incapable of predicting the previous one…Sorry for digressing. Anyway, if you add to what I have just mentioned my personal flaws — a tendency to constantly underestimate myself and the fact that I have been raised by my parents in a secure cocoon are certainly at the top of the list — you can imagine how it hurts to have these dark thoughts slowly depraving you from your precious energy.
Okay I’m done with the pathetic side of my story. What I want to share with you is the ecstatic moment I experienced while wandering in one of the Italian paintings rooms of the Musée du Louvre. In French we have a quite untranslatable word which is “flâner” and which could be translated as “wandering aimlessly” but in a sort of bohemian way. As Victor Hugo once put it: “Errer est humain; flâner est parisien” (“To wander is human; flâner is Parisian”). In my opinion, taking the time to go every week to the museum has a remarkable soothing effect. It is precisely what I did on this apparently normal Wednesday.
I had decided to spend at least one hour in the galleries of the Louvre in order to relieve the tension in my mind. It was around 5pm and I was about to enter the next room of the Italian paintings section when my eyes suddenly met the glance of a little brunette. We were only a few meters away and could not take off our eyes from each other during these four seconds that were like instants of eternity. The coup de grâce was her mischievous smile whose intensity was delicately increasing as the distance between us was fading. During this truly special moment I can comfortably say that we loved each other and projected into each other some of our deepest inner feelings. As soon as she vanished in the international waves of tourists I felt completely transformed, full of love and reluctant to come down from my newly-discovered cloud. Only a few seconds after this intense exchange I realized that we met next to a painting by Botticelli which confronts the viewer with the touching glance of the young St. John the Baptist.
It is what I learnt that day, that the more you focus on what is happening in your direct surrounding the more you are able to detach yourself from the potential negativity of your mental state. Life can grant you unexpected moments, we “just” have to start being present to those unpredictable and generous moments that our daily life is full of. That day I learnt that being present to the moment is not a superficial motto but a unique mental haven that we shall constantly keep in mind.
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