7 objects in her bag:
Inside the notebook there was a flower that never dies. Cherry, it was her name, would like you to believe that. In fact, the flower was dead but still beautiful. Because Cherry was attached to external beauty, for her, the flower was alive. That was all that it mattered to her.
While she did her make-up in the tube, a short bald man, who smelled funny, looked at her and made a derogatory face. She thought “so you can be ugly and smelly, but I cannot put my make-up on in the tube? Fuck-off!”. In reality, she feels awkward and cringes a bit. She makes herself smaller, occupying less space. She wanted to still do her eyebrows and lips, but she didn’t. She applied a colourless lip balm and put everything away. She stood still and wished she wasn’t there. When Cherry’s stop came, she got up and left.
London can be anything you want. You can either call it the big smoke and curse the bad things, or see the opportunities lying ahead. Cherry had big dreams, so for her London was the latter.
The idea that Cherry had to always put on a show was very much embroiled with who she was. She could not take a break. The sun wasn’t really shining, there were some sunny spells, but she still put on those ridiculous shiny sunglasses. Show, remember? Walking through Leicester Square (it was funny hearing foreigners saying it) was a challenge. High hells and sunglasses she caught the attention of most people. Some tourists thought she was famous, so they took pictures. The closest Cherry was to fame was to appear by accident in a news broadcast about the chihuahua who pooped in the middle of Space NK. Awkward.
Whilst walking, Cherry took her mobile and started filming herself. She made sure she looked good before, so she quickly applied lip-gloss. Fuchsia was the colour. Ok. Good thing the sunglasses were enormous, they hid her eyebrows so no need to have them done. It would be awkward to do them in the middle of the street. Cherry started to walk again and press the recording button. The video lasted 1minute and 34 seconds precisely, no need to prolong the pain of knowing that no one cared about her and her life. She didn’t really know what she was doing wrong. She got all the make-up products that she needed to look that way and the clothes to match. Some were uncomfortable, but the show, remember? So, she wore them. She checked her phone and there was 3 likes. One from Jo, her best friend, Bethany and her dad, her biggest fan. Not that Cherry had any talent, but that didn’t stop anyone else, correct? Plenty of people were like that, so why did Cherry have to have one? All she needed was to look good and act a certain way. A way like a show was always on.
After going to the dammed Space NK, to a New Look and H&M, she felt it coming and approaching. That feeling in the middle of her chest that was so daunting, sending a chill to the very core of her soul.
Mommy what are souls? Do you believe in them? The silence that she almost always got, made her sad, like there was something wrong with her. That blank stare really spoked her though. Eventually she stopped asking things.
6:52pm always distraught her. She knew once why, now she forgot, but the emptiness and coldness was so deep, like someone diving into the ends of the Pacific. She looked around and took her sunglasses. No point having them now. She felt stupid and lonely, so lonely.
image from here